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How to stop feeling guilty

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

All of us feel guilt at some time or another. But if you think that guilt’s a purely negative thing that you ought to be avoiding at all costs, pause. I believe that guilt can actually be an incredibly useful emotion, and if we learn what it’s trying to tell us we can absolutely learn how to stop feeling guilty, as well.

As a mother, it feels that guilt is almost something that’s inbuilt into my life – so you’ll have to excuse me if this blog is a bit mum-centric as I share my personal experience. Because guilt’s absolutely not a feeling that’s limited to mothers.

Whether it’s an awareness of our impact on the environment, the amount of time we spend with our partners, our choices about what we eat or how we behave, there are plenty of things to potentially feel guilty about in the modern world.

So how on earth can this actually be something that’s helpful to us?

Guilt: a personal story

When my first child, James, was born, I was fortunate to be able to take a big chunk of time off. So the classic “Mum guilt” didn’t have such an impact on me. But when our second child, Rosie, came along, that all changed.

As our vision has evolved over the past few years, I’ve fallen more and more deeply in love with this work and our amazing community. More than just a job, this is my soul calling – my true purpose in the world. So when Rosie was born I knew one thing to be true: I didn’t want to stop working with One of many just at the point where it felt our mission was really gathering momentum.

That means my work has grown alongside my family. Rosie’s been coming along with me to events since she was 5 weeks old. Of course, I made some changes to accommodate my needs as a new mum, but halting my contribution to the team completely just wouldn’t have felt right.

And there you have it, the perfect recipe for guilt: two children for whom I am the sun, moon and stars, and a business that I’m absolutely clear is my soul purpose.

James is old enough now to be able to ask me outright: “Why do you have to go to work today – why can’t you pick me up from school?” Cue the guilt!

Don’t get me wrong, I know how lucky I am. For so many mums, doing the school pickup is never an option, let alone being able to work from home and spend time together during holidays and breaks.

And then there are mums like our team’s amazing Wendy, who almost lost her life after the birth of her third child. Seriously ill, it just wasn’t possible for her to be there in the way she wanted to for her newborn baby – and yet the guilt was still there!

Whether you’re a mum or not, I don’t think guilt is something any of us can escape from experiencing, but it’s really important we pay attention to it: and here’s why.

Why guilt can be so destructive

If we find ourselves doing guilt a lot, it’s often because we’ve slipped into the disempowering archetype of the Martyr. This is often associated with the role of mother, whether or not or you have children. If that sounds confusing – being a Mother when you don’t have kids? – let me explain.

In our Women’s PowerTypes™ tool, Mother is one of the powerful roles that all of us women can choose to step into. Along with Warrioress, Queen, Sorceress and Lover, it’s a PowerType we can draw on from time to time.

Regardless of whether or not you have children of your own, Mother is our nurturing, compassionate, deeply loving side that sees the best in everyone and is always there to offer comfort and support.

It’s also an aspect that, when over-expressed, can slip into feeling guilty, and ultimately become the Martyr, endlessly exhausting herself in the service of others.

When guilt become destructive

It can be tempting to try and fight feelings of guilt with more action. To take another example, perhaps you feel guilty about not spending enough time with your friends – and book in drinks on an evening when you’ve already done a full day of work, made dinner and done all the evening chores at home. You meet your friend feeling tired, ratty, and utterly uninterested in hearing the latest saga in her ongoing feud with a colleague.

That’s when guilt can lead to resentment, and start to become really destructive in our relationships. We start telling ourselves that everyone else gets attention before we do, and forget the importance of really giving to ourselves.

So why do we feel guilt?

If we can’t get rid of guilt by doing more, what’s the solution?

The whole issue of guilt starts to make a lot more sense when we get to the bottom of the real reason we feel guilty.

Guilt is an emotion that prompts us to take a look at whether we’re really living according to our values.

So, when you feel it, the important thing to do is to stop. If you know what your values are, you can do a quick check in – are you living in alignment with them right now? If the answer’s yes, you know you can let go of that guilt.

For me, I know that self-expression is a really high value for me. Contributing through my work is the impact I am here on this planet to make, and so I’m able to recognize that, although my instincts as a mother create feelings of guilt from time to time, they’re not something I need to hold on to.

How to let go of guilt

If you’re clear you’re living up to your values, and yet you’re still finding it really hard to release any guilty feelings that come up, it might be a sign that you’re hanging on to an emotion from the past that it’s time to let go of.

That might even include guilt you’ve inherited from someone else. If your own mother felt a lot of guilt, you might have been brought up hearing things like “it’s selfish to think about yourself”.

In our members area we have free resources to help you release emotions, including guilt, which might be holding you back. You can click here to join our community and get access to all of them, including a free audio recording all about emotions and how to manage them.

Guilt and you

Guilt’s such a common emotion that it’s really important we gain the understanding we need of why it occurs and what we can do to shift it.

Whether it’s taking the time to look after yourself – so your Mother doesn’t slip into Martyr – or dealing with residual emotions that are no longer serving you, addressing guilt is a powerful way to create change in your life.

And the effect on those around you, if guilt is something that’s been a big presence in your life, can be immense.

How about you? Does guilt play a big part in your life, or is it something you’re pretty confident you know how to handle? Share your experience in the comments.

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many™ women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

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Guest blog: How to build inner confidence

By

Helen Reynolds
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Helen Reynolds

Image Consultant | Professional Shopper | Blogger | Mum of two boys | Sock Washer |Confidence Booster
Helen Reynolds
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Latest posts by Helen Reynolds (see all)

Equipping you with the tools you need to go out and make positive change happen is our number one goal. And one vital tool that we could all do with a bit more of is confidence – the kind that lights us up from the inside.

As a gender, on average, we are far less confident than the average man. Lower confidence levels mean that we are far less likely to take the brave, crucial, and damn difficult, first steps needed to make the progress that our world needs.

How to build inner confidence

Why is this? Well, there is lots in the mixing pot, from our likelihood of suffering from imposter syndrome, to the effect of the media and the way we beat ourselves up about not being ‘perfect’ enough.

Sadly, it’s a fact that the way we feel about how we look impacts the level of confidence we have. If you aren’t happy with how you look on the outside, especially if you don’t feel that the clothes you wear truly represents the you on the inside, it can monkey with your confidence.

If you’ve ever had that horrible sensation of not ‘looking the part’ you know that it can prevent you from having the courage to ask for a promotion, get out and meet people, or take on a job that involves regular board meetings or speaking engagements. This is wrong, but it’s also fact.

Having ‘What the heck am I going to wear today?’ squared away FOR LIFE means having one less thing to worry about, and brings with it the confidence of knowing that you always look authentically yourself.

So, how to get this sorted?

Well, when Jo wanted to deal with this herself she asked me for my help. And today I want to share the advice I gave her – and my other clients – when it came to creating a signature style that would really help her to have the biggest impact.

I’ve created this video to help you learn how to develop a ‘personal style’ that reflects your personality and makes choosing the right outfit for the right occasion effortless.

You’ll discover:

• Why some clothes, no matter how nice or expensive they are, make you feel terrible.
• The 3 steps you can take today to figure out your personal style.
• How to get your image sorted for life, so that you can get on with everything else!

Here it is….

 

There’s something truly empowering about knowing that you look the best version of yourself, without having to resort to spending a fortune, or slavishly following fashion.

So you can carry on being the leader you are here to be.

 

About Helen Reynolds

Helen Reynolds: How to build inner confidenceHelen Reynolds is one of our BeFruitful mentors, and works personally with Jo to put together her powerful outfits for the stage.

As an image consultant she’s helped hundreds of women to turbo-boost their personal style and develop killer confidence. Her speciality is in helping women who have lost their way with style and need a boost find clothes they love – and which love them back.

Time to get your style sorted?

If you’d like an easy way to get this stuff sorted out, and learn more, why not join Helen at her ‘Get Your Style Sorted!’ Masterclass in London on 12th of May. Helen has been running this annual event for the past five years and plenty of women in our community have attended.

Not only is it a great day out, but you’ll come away knowing the fundamental lessons that you need to create a personal style for yourself. Having this stuff nailed takes the stress out of shopping and ends wondering what to wear FOR LIFE.

To get £27 off the usual ticket price (and bring a friend for half price!) click here to book your ticket.

This will be an awesome day out, and a fantastic opportunity to spend some time on yourself in the company of great women, so, don’t miss out on the opportunity to get your style sorted!

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What is your money mindset?

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

What is your money mindset? Do you have a sense of your overall approach to money? Are you aware that how you think about money impacts the decisions you make day to day and month to month?

Today I want to share a different perspective on your relationship to your finances – one you might not have come across before.  It can be a powerful frame through which to understand the part you play, consciously or unconsciously, in your financial experience.

Becoming more powerful in the way we create and use our wealth is a vital part of our mission here at One of Many, and is a priority for women globally.

  • Globally, women control a staggering $36 trillion, and that number is growing.
  • According to the National Association of Women Business Owners, one in five firms in the US with a revenue of $1 million or more is woman-owned.
  • Across the pond in the UK, the Office of National Statistics reports that “women accounted for an unprecedented 80% of the new self-employed between 2008 and 2011”, and that number has continued to rise.

As more and more women become active participants in the global economy, whether through managing our own business or playing a part in leading others’ organizations, our relationship to our finances matters.

When it comes to money, what’s your motivation?

Money is a subject that often involves a lot of unspoken assumptions and judgments, going right back to childhood.

Perhaps when you were growing up you were told “we can’t afford it” as a way of saying no to things you wanted.

You might have been raised hearing sayings like “A fool and his money are soon parted”.

Money might have been used to confer approval or value – like being given an extra allowance if you did well in exams, or extravagant presents to cheer you up.

As an adult, some of these inherited beliefs will continue to inform your feelings towards money. Contrary to a common misconception, money certainly isn’t a “dry” or “emotionless” topic (and the best accountants aren’t people devoid of feelings!). The numbers we see when we look (or don’t look, as the case may be) at our bank statements can evoke powerful emotions.

And it’s those feelings about money, both what we have and what we haven’t got, that contribute to our money mindset.

Action: Take a few moments to jot down a few ideas about how you relate to money, using these prompts as your starting point.

When I was a child, money was…

When it comes to making money, I believe it’s…

People with money are…

When I think about my future finances, my biggest wish is…

The answer to the final question is what we’re going to take a look at in a bit more detail now.

What is your money mindset? The quick test

Take a look at your goals for your finances and ask yourself this question: do they mainly reflect a “towards” or “away from” mentality?

Here’s what I mean by that: A “towards” mentality means that you’re motivated by something you’re working to.

This can apply to any area of your life, but in financial terms it might be a goal like:

  • Going on holiday
  • Having 3 months of living expenses in savings

It could also be something more general:

  • Understanding investments
  • Feeling confident talking about my finances

The key thing is that the motivation is all coming from that inspiring vision of the future and all the good it brings.

An “away from” mentality is the opposite: this is the motivation that drives you away from a place you don’t want to be.

Perhaps your goal is more like:

  • Stop having arguments about money
  • Never having to think twice before spending
  • Getting out of debt

Can you see the difference in those statements?

Why your motivation matters

You can’t think about “stopping money arguments”, without focussing on the arguments and the pain they bring.

If your drive is “to get out of debt”, you’ll only have enough motivation to get you out of debt… and then no further.

This “away from” mentality is one I often see in entrepreneurs I work with. Business owners can find they’re really fired up by hitting rock bottom, or by starting out with very few funds in place. Lots of small businesses go into overdrive when the cashflow dries up – suddenly, we’re out there meeting clients, making sales, and getting creative with new marketing ideas.

The trouble with this kind of motivation is that when you do reach a place of stability, your momentum flags.

Suddenly, you no longer have the “wolf at the door” to drive you forward. The business loses energy, things start to slip, and before you know it the bottom line’s taking a downward turn… until you get to the next crisis point.

Even if you’re not a business owner, you might relate to this mindset. Perhaps you’re highly aware of your family’s finances when you’re watching every penny you spend. But when a payrise gives you a boost and you’re no longer worried about money you find yourself making purchases and financial decisions without a second thought. And then, whoops – overspending.

Changing our relationship with money

Financial freedom doesn’t mean freedom from thinking about money. It means beginning to think about money in a different way. One of the most fundamental shifts we can use is to shift our motivation to a “towards” approach.

What are you working towards? You might have some quick material ideas in mind:

  • Paying off the mortgage
  • Going on holiday
  • nvesting in something that will make a real difference to your day to day life.

But beyond that, there’s a future which involves a relationship with money. When you think about your goals, start to make that a part of the picture, and to reframe it using a “towards” mindset.

“Never having to worry about money” might become “Feeling confident about the decisions I’m making for my money” or “Being supported by experts who can give me good advice about my money”.

When you think about your future, can you imagine “Knowing that my money is working hard to create opportunities for my family”?

Going deeper when it comes to money mindset

It might sound like simple linguistics.  And on one level it is.

The deeper level to take this to, is when you can release the feelings underneath the away from motivation.

In our example again –

  • When you transform the hurt under the money arguments, you will automatically experience freedom in your communications
  • When you heal the pain of having nothing as a child, you won’t constantly find yourself thinking twice about whether you can now “afford” every purchase
  • When you let go of the guilt you feel because of the debt you’ve accumulated, you’ll find a freedom to get creative and build your wealth.

I’m really curious about which of these mindsets you currently identify with most when it comes to your finances. Share your reflections in the comments below, and let us know what your “away from” drivers are, and perhaps what your “towards” motivation might look like. Let’s inspire each other!

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many™ women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

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How to not burnout: A 4-step response

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

These days, pushing ourselves past capacity is something of an epidemic among women. Beyond the hype about “having it all” are some pretty sobering statistics – like the fact that right now, we’re 60% more likely to suffer job stress and burnout than men. So when it comes to reaching our potential, learning how to not burn out needs to be a priority. Trying to be “superwoman” really does come at an insidious cost.

One of our BePowerful participants, Mary, saw that play out vividly in her life: “In the past I did Superwoman spectacularly and burned out” she reflected.

That kind of experience can be a huge motivator in seeking support to change the pattern. Of course, we can’t stop life from gathering momentum but we can choose how we respond to when it does.

How to not burnout – the 4-step response

1. Look after yourself

Especially when there’s a lot on your plate, taking care of your needs and asking for the support you need is vital. It can be easy to lose perspective when we’re not at our best, but there’s usually an inner whisper that tells us when things are getting too much.

So listen to it and get honest with yourself: how well are you really coping? Is it time for a break? What’s going on physically for you? Gentle awareness of your own needs and acknowledgment of all you’re doing (rather than focusing on what you’re not getting to) is the first step to making a change.

2. Replenish your energy

Did you know that cortisol, the hormone released when we’re stressed, prepares the body for a fight-or-flight response by releasing glucose? Even if we’re not resorting to sweet treats to get us through the day, feeling constantly stressed or anxious effectively floods our body with sugar.

Replenishing ourselves and reducing cortisol takes more than just stopping. It also means finding a way to release that fight-or-flight reflex by taking exercise (a walk in the fresh air is a great start), meditating, or making active choices to address our workload.

3. Stop over committing

Sometimes we don’t realise how over committed we are until looking at the diary makes us want to crawl back under the duvet. And yet we keep saying “yes” to more and more things, because we don’t want to offend people or feel as though we’re letting anyone else down.

Burnout thrives when we put our need to feel helpful above our own capacity. Get real about what you can commit to – and practice saying “no” politely until it’s second nature.

4. Prioritise

The fact is, we can’t do everything, and telling ourselves we could if we only pushed ourselves harder is what results in overwhelm. Our culture tends to reward “busy-ness”, and it’s easy to find ourselves taking on more and more without stopping to consider the bigger picture.

Prioritising means we need to get really clear on our values and the bigger impact we want to make. Beyond being “busy”, how are the activities that fill our day actually making a difference to our families, our communities, and the world?

Learning to let go anything that doesn’t contribute to that is a challenge for all of us, but to avoid burnout, we have to learn to change our expectations. Make sure you do only what really matters.

Banishing Superwoman

These steps might be straightforward, but they’re definitely not easy. Putting our own needs first, saying no, and getting clear on how we really want to spend our time and energy is a challenge for all women. After all, most of us have been raised in cultures which expect us to be the cheerful, capable high-achievers in everything we do.

But those statistics about overwhelm and burnout speak for themselves. “Superwoman” is a role that comes at the expense of our health, our wellbeing and ultimately our impact on the world.

Don’t let her take over your life.

If you’ve experienced your own brush with burnout in whatever form, do share what you’ve learned in the comments below. Your experience might be just what another woman needs to read today.

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many™ women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

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How to say no politely

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

If you wear lots of different hats in the course of your life, you know how valuable it is to know how to say no politely.

It’s one thing to say no to things you don’t want to do. But finite time and energy also means turning down requests for things we’d love to do from people we’d love to help.

So, how to say no politely without sacrificing our relationships or letting people down?

In this episode of Jo & Co, I’m breaking down the really simple template I use when I need to turn down an opportunity that doesn’t fit in with my priorities.

I deliberately designed this to be really simple because these kinds of challenges come around so often, and when you want to be helpful it’s incredibly tempting to say yes. I wanted a quick little framework I could whip out every time, and I hope you find it helpful when it comes to honouring your time without letting other people down.

3 steps to a healthy “no”

In the video I share:

  • What you need to be clear about BEFORE you get the ask
  • The crucial distinction that allows you to say no without offending, letting people down, or hurting their feelings
  • My 3-step process that leaves the other person feeling you’ve helped them without compromising your priorities

The most effective people in life are the ones who are able to gracefully say no to everything that takes them away from their values.

Saying “I’m just too busy” won’t cut it – it implies that we’re frantic, stressed and short on time. It also suggests we’re so bad at prioritising we can’t actually make space for something we’d be interested in – what a mixed message! It can really leave the other person confused about where they stand.

Using this framework allows us to say no at the same time as building relationships and supporting those around us. That’s crucial if we’re to have our biggest impact, and it’s something we can absolutely help each other learn and practice. So, when you’ve watched the video, I’d love to know what you’re going to say no to! Let’s encourage and support each other in the comments below.

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many™ women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

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What the hell is empowerment?

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

Empowerment – What the hell is empowerment? We hear this word so often in today’s world, in the workplace, in all the self-development talk but can we really relate to it? Do we know what it actually means to us?

Ask yourself this:
What does it mean to be empowered? Or

What does being an empowered woman feel like?

For that matter- have I ever felt it?!

What the hell is this empowerment thing?

Sometimes the problem is in the definition. How we define things will either make them easy for us to experience, or difficult to experience.

So first, let’s take a moment to explore what empowerment is not.

Let me introduce you to her sister DISEMPOWERMENT – She’s the complete opposite of her stronger, cheerleader of a sister. Disempowerment can be characterised by the space you find yourself in when you’re not feeling your best.

We define it as “when you want or need to take a certain path of action but don’t because of internal stop signs”

Disempowerment can be a great big brick wall standing between you and your natural power.

What do I mean by internal stop signs?

These are reasons, the justifications and yes as uncomfortable as it is, the excuses that we tell ourselves which lead to inaction. It might result in procrastination or that feeling of just not being able to make that breakthrough.

Stop signs are the little voices that say icky stuff like:

  • I can’t do that.
  • I don’t have the time.
  • I can’t afford it.
  • I don’t have the right skills.

Now, please don’t get me wrong we all have these thoughts from time to time especially when we’re not at our best.

They are often absolutely 100% valid reasons and objections. “Look at my bank account” you might say, “I don’t have any money! Its not an excuse, it’s the truth.”

And while I get it. I also don’t buy it.

Stick with me on this – I promise I’ll explain without you stamping your feet and saying “She has no idea!!”

Let’s take a look at an example of what disempowerment can look like in action or should I say inaction!

Say hello to Suzie…

Suzie has been a stay at home mum for some time but her children are growing up fast and she feels that now is HER time to do something for herself, to get back in touch with the workplace and start up her own bookkeeping business.

She’s excited about this next chapter in her life. She knows what she needs to do – there’s a night class bookkeeping course running at a local college and YET she’s made no move to enrol – What’s holding her back? You got it, those darn stop signs!

Suzie is feeling disempowered because every time she thinks she’ll enrol she comes up with

  • “We can’t afford it“
  • “I don’t have child-care“
  • “I don’t have the car Tuesdays“
  • “I’m the one that does everything“
  • “I won’t have the time, no-one ever helps me!“
  • “Who’ll cook the dinner?“

This kind of thinking is never going to empower Suzie into action.

All these reasons are driving her lack of empowerment.

They are keeping her stuck in a rut and holding her back from unleashing her creativity, her innovation, her effectiveness.

You see, there’s way too many examples out there of women who may have not had the money, the upbringing, the privilege, the opportunity to do something they wanted to do. But because they had a vision- they still found a way to MAKE it happen.

That’s empowerment.

Let’s look at it another way…

Here at One of many™, we work with archetypes to understand empowerment.

  1. The empowering 5 Women’s PowerTypes™:
    • the Warrioress,
    • the Lover,
    • the Mother,
    • the Queen
    • and the Sorceress
  2. And the disempowering ones of
    • the Bitch,
    • the Martyr
    • and the Victim.

It’s these latter three archetypes that are responsible for those stop signs. They can often be found blaming others, feeling like it’s them against the whole world or the whole world is against them!

They are unhelpful, unsupportive and totally disempowering.

So, how can we be empowered?

Step 1: Ditch the bitch! or whatever disempowering archetype is your poison of choice. Take notice of the part of you that surfaces when you’re feeling less than your best, lacking in confidence or fearful.

Step 2: Tap into the supportive and resilient energy one of your PowerTypes™ – there’s one for every situation!

You don’t have to choose between being a bitch or a martyr – choose to be a Queen.

The Queen PowerType™ is the perfect choice for empowerment. She holds a powerful vision for her future, she is decisive, resilient and not afraid to delegate or ask for support.

Let’s go back to Suzie for a moment – What would it look like if she chose to access to her Queen PowerType™, and ask “What would my Queen do?”

Well, it would probably go something like this…

  • “We can’t afford it“: She’d see the course as an investment in her future. She’d apply for an increase to the credit limit on her card, or draw down on the mortgage, or borrow from her mum, or sell all the old baby furniture cluttering up the garage. She’d get creative about where the money IS and how she can access it to provide a better future for herself and her family.
  • “I don’t have child-care“: She’d get creative in conversations with her husband, her neighbour, the 13 yo next door, she’d look at online courses she can do from home…
  • “I don’t have the car Tuesdays“: She’d look up buses, borrow a bike,
  • “I’m the one that does everything“: She’d ignore this little commentary from the Martyr, and set up a rota so everyone helps out.
  • “I won’t have the time, no-one ever helps me!“: She’ll get her diary out and take control of her time, she’ll ask for the help she needs.
  • “Who’ll cook the dinner?“: She’ll realise that no-one ever died from one microwave meal a week!

How different does that look? – How empowering!

You can almost feel the uprush of “make sh!t happen” energy that comes on the tail of being her Queen.

So just how can we recognise empowerment?

An empowered individual is someone who can access their internal resources to empower themselves.

They are resilient and can easily switch into problem-solving mode when faced with a challenge.

They are able to seek out or build a supportive network to help them to achieve goals and overcome setbacks.

Have you ever been “disempowered” in relationship to a challenge you’ve had, and then shifted your thinking to come up with creative solutions? Share in the comments. Let’s all inspire one another with stories of our own empowerment.

Who knows – your share here could change someone’s life!

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many™ women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

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What are the Women’s PowerTypes™?

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

Depending on how long you’ve been with us you may or may not be aware of one of the central tools in our work – the Women’s PowerTypes™.

Allow me to explain a little…

For far too long the only way we have thought we can be taken seriously and get results in the world is to behave like Superwoman. Strong, capable, dominating, often frantic, inefficient, scary…

She is the one responsible for our burn out, our relationship issues, and our lack of joy.

So if being Superwoman isn’t the answer, what is?

Allow me to introduce The Women’s Powertypes™

We believe we need a new kind of power to be the leaders the world needs us to be.

We need a new kind of power to lead the fulfilling lives we want to lead.

A power grounded in collaboration, not competition. A power of co-operation not coercion. A power centred in replenishment not depletion.

At One of many™ we call this new power, “soft power”.

And because so few of us have role models of this way of being, we use the Women’s PowerTypes™ to serve as our inspiration and guides.

Work with the PowerTypes™ and you will not only be strong and effective, but also true to the softer aspects of your nature.

You’ll be taken seriously, without having to take yourself so seriously.

You’ll achieve more, without burning yourself out.

The 5 Women’s PowerTypes™ we work with are: the Warrioress, the Lover, the Mother, the Queen and the Sorceress.

Let me explain each of them a little for you, and perhaps you can start to hear which may be your Primary PowerType™.

The Warrioress

Energetic and youthful, the Warrioress is characterized by her commitment to fighting for justice. Like the mythical Amazonian woman, she’s courageous, independent and quick to act. With the strength of a tigress she looks after her own. Others admire her raw energy, but she can be hard to keep up with.

She leads through cause & participation

As a leader you will find her standing alongside her fellow teammates, with her sleeves rolled up, getting involved. She leads by example, often by being the best, or most dedicated and others run to keep up with her.

The Lover

The Lover is characterised not just by her sensuality and sexuality, but by her enjoyment of emotion, feeling and a love of life itself. She’s the source of life, of creativity. She relishes in the exploration of the world through her five senses, and delights in giving and receiving pleasure in all domains. She is the centre of our own self-care and knows how to take care of herself, and not burn out.

She leads through invitation & appreciation.

Rarely denied, as a leader the Lover is captivating and magnetic. Her invitations hold the promise of a rich experience and she is thus able to tempt others to coming on board with her. She showers her team with gifts, appreciation and experiences that delight the senses. People follow her because they love her.

The Mother

A woman does not need to have children to have a robust Mother PowerType. Always available to provide a space of safety, warmth and solace, the Mother is where we all go for nurture and nourishment. She is patient and kind, mothering not just her children, but all children and the planet. She is always looking to bring out the best in others. She will sometimes sacrifice her own needs for those she identifies as her family. She is centred in the earth energy of late summer.

She leads through love & encouragement

As a leader the mother uses gentle encouragement, teaching and coaching as her tools of choice. She patiently works to bring out the best in every member of her team, certain in the knowledge that everyone’s contribution is valuable and important. She looks to the wellbeing of her team, and supports them to take care of themselves.

The Queen

Comfortable in leadership and certain of her place in the world, the Queen epitomises grace and dignity. She is deeply committed to her realm, and holds a clear vision for what she desires for those in it. People are fiercely dedicated to her vision, and will often lay down their lives in the service of her ideals.

She leads through vision & inspiration

Perhaps the most obvious “leader” PowerType the Queen is happy to be in charge and have the final say. She inspires loyalty, service and dedication not because of who she is, but because of the powerful vision she holds for the team. People are driven to provide for her needs, as she holds the space for greatness for all. She provides unbiased guidance and sanction, order and structure. Her team members will often work beyond their own limits to provide for the vision, and exhaustion and burnout can ensue.

The Sorceress

Connected to a higher power, the Sorceress knows that magic and miracles happen in the every day. She understands and works with the bridge between the seen and unseen. She’s highly innovative, and facilitates transformation. She is naturally curious, searching for information, wisdom and knowledge. She is a master of her chosen technologies. She enjoys her own company and her daily life abounds with ritual.

She leads through faith & wisdom.

With her belief that “everything is possible”, her team admire her magical abilities to see solutions, or come up with new ideas. She always has the right piece of knowledge and knows just how to apply it. Because of her deep understanding and connection, her team will follow her advice and defer to her wisdom. She works powerfully with the energies between team members knowing that the energy of the group ultimately impacts the outcome.

Which Women’s PowerType Are You?

Ever since we started teaching these Women’s PowerTypes™, women have been asking “which one am I?” Well- the good news is you can now find out!

We have developed a comprehensive profiling tool so that you can discover which PowerTypes™ you’re great at, and which you’re, well, not so great at (and why that’s important…)

What’s more, we’ve created a three-part mini-training to help you debrief your profile and understand the significance of your personal PowerType™ makeup to your work, your relationships, your health and vitality.

Discover your unique personal and leadership strengths with our brand new Women’s PowerTypes™ Profile.

The Women’s PowerType™ Profile is just One of many tools we have created to help unleash your bold and courageous leadership.

And that all starts with understanding your potential.

 

Discover your true path to bold and effective leadership by taking the Women’s PowerType™ Profile test today.

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many™ women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

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How to be confident

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

How can I be more confident?

It’s a question I’ve been asked more times than I can count. So let me try and answer it definitively. But first, let’s dispel a few myths.

I personally believe there is a lot of rubbish being talked about confidence.

The Problem with Aiming for “Being More Confident”

I feel that we have the focus in the wrong place. When it comes to confidence the focus seems to be very much about getting us to a destination, a place where we are invincible and fearless, ready to take on any task that we are faced with. Like a Superwoman, she’s unshakeable- you can throw her into a foreign country, with strangers, having jumped out of an aeroplane to deliver a challenging business presentation and a vocal solo and she’ll handle it all with aplomb because she oozes confidence.

Come on!

Do you actually know ANYONE who fits this definition of confidence? I only know one or two, and to be perfectly honest I think they may have a bit of a personality disorder… so let’s redefine it!

Having confidence is not about being a confident person ALL THE TIME.

Let’s face it: we are all different. We are introverts and extroverts. We’re bubbly or serene. We all have totally different personalities so this idea that a “confident person” is one type, one size fits all, flies in the face of our individuality.

We don’t all need to become some sort of bubbly social butterfly who is always chatting up strangers and singing karaoke. Of course, that’s great if you want it, but our focus at One of many is to develop a confidence that fits with who you truly are.

So if confidence isn’t being a fearless daredevil who’s ready to leap into the unknown without so much as a backwards glance, what is it?

You feel confident in relationship to something

Confidence is how you feel when you’re asked about the everyday tasks you carry out without a thought.

Let me ask you something: “Can you tie your shoelaces?”

Did you answer yes?

Notice that feeling you have about the answer to that question? Unless you never progressed past velcro straps on your trainers, that feeling– that is confidence.

You see, confidence is something that comes in relation to a certain task we want to be doing.

It’s not a permanent state of being. It’s how you feel about your ability to do something.

How much confidence is enough?

When talking about confidence we also have a tendency to think about it in terms of something we are lacking. But I believe that most of us have enough confidence to do most things we desire, it’s just that we are looking for it in the wrong places.

Let me ask you this: can you walk into a shop and ask where they keep the milk?

If you have enough self-esteem for this- you have the makings of all the confidence you need. Some people can’t do that. They may have debilitating social issues, like huge anxiety or agoraphobia. But if you have enough self-esteem for this, you have the makings to be able to do most things.

If I have the confidence where do I find it?

For most of us, the reason we don’t feel confident to do stuff is because of Imposter Syndrome. It’s that icky feeling that we’re going to get found out, that we’re not qualified or good enough for the task at hand. This is something that I have suffered from massively in the past and my remedy for this is simple and here it is:

Surround yourself with people who believe in you more than you believe in yourself.

For me, it’s my Mum, my sisters, friends and my team here at One of many™. These people all encourage me to push myself to do things, they are my cheerleaders.

The Three Steps to Confidence

  1. Surround yourself with people who believe in you.

Now, this is a probably a little controversial because most personal development coaches will tell you confidence comes from within but I believe that it really can come from outside of you. When you surround yourself with people who have high expectations of what you’re capable of, you just sort of get on with doing things! If you allow yourself to, you learn to live into that space that they are holding for you.

  1. Ask “Do I have the skills and knowledge I need?”

So what happens when everyone around you believes in you but you still think “there’s no way I can do this thing!” Because let’s face it- that still happens!!

The next step to accessing confidence for a situation is to do check to see if you actually KNOW how to handle a situation. Ask yourself:

  • Do I know how to do this?
  • Do I have the knowledge and skills?
  • Have I got what it takes?

Because I know way too many people who expect themselves to be confident at something with no education. I teach public speaking a lot. And so many people say “I could never do that”. But they’ve never been taught how! They don’t know what they would say, how to structure a talk that gives them confidence, how to deliver a talk etc. So of course they’ll think they can’t do it. If no-one taught you to tie a shoelace you’d have no confidence for that either!

When trying to feel more confident gaining education around what it is you’re trying to achieve can be a really great place to start.

  1. Choose the right Women’s PowerType for the job

Once you have educated yourself on what it takes the next step is to decide who will take on this task. Now, I know you’re probably thinking well it’s me of course and you’re absolutely right but what we’re talking about here is deciding which part of you is the best woman for the job.

At One of many™, we talk about the five Women’s PowerTypes™; The Lover, The Mother, The Queen, The Warrioress and The Sorceress. Our PowerTypes are the parts of us that we call upon to help us at different times.

We can all play the clown in the right situation, we can be the caregiver or nurturing mother, depending on the situation. So what I’m suggesting here is we can consciously draw upon any one of our PowerTypes for confidence.

Imagine this …

You have just started a new job and you’ve been invited to the office party and you’re feeling nervous about stepping into a room of unfamiliar people, wondering if you’ll have the confidence to talk to new people.

This would be the perfect time to bring in your Queen PowerType. The Queen is serene and graceful, she is the type that walks into to a room and owns it, she doesn’t do guilt and is totally assured of her place in her realm.

Well, we all have the Queen within us, it’s just a question of accessing that power in your body and consciously using it as a tool to gain more confidence in a situation, in this case bringing her to the party!

The same goes for all of the five PowerTypes, you just need to know what part to access and when is the best time to do it.

If you’d like to learn more about using your Women’s PowerTypes, do check out our free Soft PowerCasts here.

So to summarise:

  • Redefine confidence to something you have in relationship to a task, not as a permanent state of being.
  • Seek out people who believe in you more than you believe in yourself and find your confidence there.
  • Make sure you have the education you need for what you’re trying to do
  • Access the relevant Women’s PowerType to pull off the task!

And let me know – what do you do to make yourself feel more confident?

 

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How to increase your confidence by putting yourself first

By

Helen Reynolds
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Helen Reynolds

Image Consultant | Professional Shopper | Blogger | Mum of two boys | Sock Washer |Confidence Booster
Helen Reynolds
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Guest Post by Helen Reynolds

Oxygen.

Water.

Food.

Shelter.

Love.

Friendship.

A beautifully cut jacket.

My hierarchy of needs runs somewhat differently from Maslow’s version.

You might laugh, or think ‘that’s ridiculous!’ And, yes, to some extent it is ridiculous! But, I know that in order to be happy, I HAVE to feel confident about how I look on the outside. I HAVE to feel looked after.

My family is composed of two teenage boys and a hard-working, globe-trotting husband, so, like many women, I have come to realise that if I’m going to feel looked after, it’s me who has to take the steps needed to make that happen.

As a professional image consultant, I meet incredible women every day; each one of them is unique. But, my clients have one huge thing in common: they’ve been putting themselves at the bottom of the list for a very long time. Of course, at times – when you are firefighting a barrage of family or work commitments – salon visits or exercise time have to be shelved. But, when you make this a way of life, it has a damaging effect on your soul.

The process that I go through when working with women is sometimes quite a revealing one. It’s not coaching, but I usually find out a lot about what makes each individual tick.

What I often discover is that, under the veneer of successful, professional person, lurks someone who feels uncomfortable in her own skin. Someone desperately unhappy with the way she looks. Someone who is often hyper-stressed or tearful about getting dressed for a big event, and who on occasion refuses invitations because she doesn’t feel confident enough in her clothes to attend. This breaks my heart.

To me, having a great outfit is about more than vanity. It’s got NOTHING to do with competing with other women, or having to look the part on the school run. It’s about looking after yourself. Letting your clothes show the authentic ‘you’ on the inside. Using what you have in your wardrobe to build your confidence and act as the armour you need to go into battle and make change happen.

Thankfully the times when being ashamed or feeling guilty about looking after our own needs are almost behind us. And, nothing makes me gladder than to see ‘self-care’, ‘filling your own cup’, ‘fitting your own oxygen mask first’, etc moving up the agenda for women.

Taking care of yourself if vital. I can’t put it better than Jo did in her recent article about how to create your own self-care plan. But, what I can do is add to the debate and end the shaming of women who like to look after themselves by outing myself!

So, in the interest of openness and female solidarity, here are the things that I enjoy doing when I take a little time for myself:

  • Regular haircuts and colour – I ALWAYS rebook when I leave the salon, otherwise I struggle to make time to ring for another appointment
  • Gym time – I’m not really ‘driven’ about exercising, but I know that my mood always lifts when I’ve done something active. If I can’t get there three times a week, I’ll prioritise a walk around the block.
  • Wardrobe management – (I know, it’s my job, but I still love it!!!) I spend time thinking about what’s in my wardrobe, where the holes are and identifying what I need to buy to make outfits complete.
  • Watching TV – I watch a lot of ‘non-intellectual’ TV programmes. I LOVE them. Some of them are woefully dreadful but they help me to wind down. Sue me.
  • Massage – I’m not talking about spa massage, but I regularly visit my local professional masseuse. Otherwise stress goes straight to my shoulder and it starts to hurt.

Having these things as my ‘go-to’ activities, just for me, mean that I am a much better mum, wife, daughter and friend. When I’ve made time in my schedule for what is important to me I’m genuinely happy to prioritise the things that are important to my family and friends, like visiting Homebase or hanging off a zip-wire. And, I am more available for everyone else without that nagging feeling that I’d prefer to be watching X Factor or sorting through my vest tops.

If you’d like to change things up, get to grips with your personal style and give your confidence a turbo-boost, why not join Helen at her fantastic Masterclass: Get Your Style Sorted! On 13th May 2017, in central London.

You can get your hands on an early-bird ticket until 24th of April 2017, when the price will increase. Helen only runs this event once per year, and places are limited, so if you want a bargain, book now!

Visit >>>> http://www.helenreynoldsstyle.com/masterclass-jm/

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The Missing Piece to Manifesting Money

By

Lara Waldman
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Lara Waldman

The Abundance Activator | Inspirational Speaker | Healer | Abundance Coach | Author
Lara Waldman
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Lara Waldman – The Abundance Activator

For many years we have been hearing about The Law of Attraction and Manifestation; how it’s possible to create the life that you desire by thinking and believing that it’s possible. But there has been a very important missing piece.

In this article I’d like to share exactly what that missing piece is and give you a simple 5 step strategy to money manifestation mastery.

Let’s start at the beginning and consider…

The Deeper Purpose of Money

Money is a vehicle to realising your dreams in the physical world. Money helps to ground the calling of your Soul and anchor it here on the planet. Money is not the source of your happiness but a vehicle to express your full essence and Purpose in the world.

Money is an amplifier. Money exposes your deepest emotions, thoughts and beliefs that keep you small, stuck and limited. Your relationship with money can trigger and expose some of your deepest fears, frustrations and challenges.

Used consciously, money can also expose your greatest purpose, your true essence and the gifts of your Soul that you have come to this planet to share with the world.

The energy of Money is neutral. It does not judge good or bad. It simply wants to create and grow. Money can support you to create and grow your dreams into physical reality if you choose to use it in this way.

When you use money consciously in this way, it can be your greatest support to help you realise your purpose and make the impact that you were born to make.

This leads me nicely to the missing piece.

It’s all about where your desires are coming from.

You can create the life that you want lead by the desires of your Ego and many people do create from this place. The problem is that creating your life from your Ego desires can also create pain and suffering along with it, not only for you, but for others as well.

But there is another place to create from. When you create your life in alignment with your Soul’s Purpose, you will be making choices that serve not only yourself, but also the lives of others and all life on this planet. Your Soul, your Higher Self, will always lead you to greatness.

When you consciously create your life in alignment with your Soul’s Purpose, then your life flows with greater ease. Don’t get me wrong, life will still present its challenges, but generally speaking life will be flowing with you, rather than against you.

So the missing piece is a simple question to ask yourself…

‘Is what I am asking for in alignment with my Soul’s Purpose?’

If it’s not, then you have yourself a problem.

Your Soul, or Higher Self, has come here for a reason. Your Purpose is far greater than what you are aware of on an Ego or personality level. If you create your life out of alignment with you Soul’s Purpose, then you will soon find out about it.

When you fall too far out of alignment with your Soul’s Purpose, you will get what I lovingly call ‘A Slap from The Universe’. For many people this can look like a difficult life changing crisis.

I have been ‘slapped’ by The Universe many times in my life. I have also supported hundreds of women through many of these turbulent life changing moments. What I have learned is that if you create your life out of flow with your Soul’s Purpose, life will force you to stop and listen.

It is my passion to empower women with The Law of Attraction and Money Manifestation to consciously fulfil their great purpose while living life to the fullest. By saying yes to receiving money in alignment with your Purpose, you are saying Yes to creating a life of greater Ease, Joy and Fulfilment.

It’s time to say good bye to unnecessary pain and suffering when it comes to money and start enjoying your life to the fullest by making the difference that you were born to make.

Take Your Power Back

You are the creator of your life. There are areas in your life where you unconsciously create a life you don’t want, rather than consciously creating a life that you do want. It’s time to let go of victim consciousness, of life happening to you and get into the drivers’ seat of your life.

Money Manifestation Mastery is about remembering just how powerful you truly are. Most people have not been taught this. Most people have been trained in victim consciousness. You have been trained that there are limited options for you and your life.

The truth is that you are a master creator. It’s time to reclaim this power and start using it consciously. This will not only create an awesome life for yourself but for everyone whose life you touch. By transforming your world, you transform the world of others. As within so without.

5 Essential Steps to Manifesting Money in Alignment With Your Purpose.

Step 1: Put In Your Order To The Universe– get clear on what you want

Most of us are very good at focusing on what we don’t want. When I ask women ‘What would you ask for if I had a magic wand?’ the majority of them will start talking about what is not working, what happened in the past and why. Most people are programmed to focus on the negative, to focus on what is not working.

The key to creating the life that you desire is to focus on what you do want.

I will ask you now, if I had a magic wand and you could have anything you like, what would you ask for?

Let’s start with money. How much money would you LOVE to bring into your life and business, with ease (not with hard work and struggle)? What would that figure be for you? It can be monthly amount, an annual amount or a lump sum. This is your Money Goal.

The great thing about Money in relation to your purpose is that larger amounts of money are more in alignment with your Soul than smaller amounts. This is because your Soul is infinite! You do not need to confine yourself by lack or limitation when it comes to money and your purpose. Allow yourself to dream big!

Money Goal

How much money would give you the feeling of financial freedom? What would make you feel really relaxed and happy when it comes to money? This can be an annual amount of money or a monthly sum of money.

Daily Action:

Ask to The Universe and Your Higher Self (aka Soul)

What would it take to bring in X amount each month/year?

Money Fuel

Next you want to get clear on what I call your Money WHY. This is your money fuel. Your money fuel is the reason behind your Money Goal. Your Money Fuel highlights what is really important to you and what you are truly asking for through the vehicle of money. Your Money Fuel will be the thing that motivates you to create your Money Goal.

Human beings are ultimately motivated by feelings. Make sure to include the feelings that would come with your money goal being realised. The feeling that you want to feel is ultimately what you are asking for!

For this next section, please get a pen and your journal or piece of paper.

Money Fuel Exercise

Take your Money Goal and ask:

Why is this amount of money important to you?
What would be the impact of this amount of money?
What does it do for your life and the lives of others?

Now take the answers to those last questions and ask the 3 questions again of the first round of answers.

Why is this amount of money important to you?
What would be the impact of this amount of money?
What does it do for your life and the lives of others?

Now take the answers to the second round of questions and ask the 3 questions one more time.

Why is that amount of money important to you?
What would be the impact of that amount of money?
What does it do for your life and the lives of others?

With each round of questions, you are unlocking your deepest desires behind your money goal. The answers to these questions will highlight your true Purpose.

Your Purpose

Your Purpose is not just what you do in the world, it’s how you are BEING in the world. Part of your purpose is to BE the truth of who you are.

Your purpose is to fully embody and express your truth in the world. There are different vehicles for your purpose to be expressed, ie: business, but ultimately it’s about sharing the gift of who you truly are with the world.

When you are deeply connected to your Purpose and your Truth, you will then be divinely guided through your life.

Step 2 Release Your Money Blocks – get out of your own way

Your money blocks are the negative thoughts, beliefs and emotions that often come up the moment after you connect to your dreams. When you opened up to what you wanted, did you notice any negative, limiting thoughts or beliefs come directly after? These are your money blocks.

Your money blocks seem very real, but they are not. They are simply negative thoughts, beliefs and emotions that you absorbed and picked up on from the world around you. You learned these patterns from your family, your ancestors, the culture that you were raised in, as well as the society that you grew up in.

Your Money Blocks hide the truth of who you are. They cover up the light of your Soul. They are designed to keep you small, limited, stuck and hidden.

Your Money Blocks stop you from stepping into the unknown. Ultimately, they are designed to keep you safe in your comfort zone.

Having these blocks is a part of your human experience. Your money blocks are part of the journey called Life, but you can also consciously release them over time. This is where you have the power of choice and the ability to consciously create your life for the better.

We could spend a long time analysing all of your money blocks, which would be interesting, but it won’t necessarily release them. Would you be willing to simply let them go?

It’s super simple to release your money blocks but you need to release them on a regular, consistent basis. Your money blocks are sneaky and feel so real! The trick is to recognise your money blocks, see them for what they are and be willing to let them go.

Your money blocks want to keep you exactly where you are in the safety of your comfort zone. Your money blocks would rather keep you in the pain of what you know, rather than the potential risks of the unknown.

Your Money Blocks, although with good intentions of keeping you safe, are actually holding you back from creating positive change in your life. It’s time to let them go if you wish to move forward with your life.

Exercise

After you ask for your Money Goal:

What would it take to bring in X amount each month/year?

You then say:

‘Anything and everything that is stopping or blocking me from welcoming that amount of money into my life with ease, I let it go now.’

The key here is not in the words that you say but rather in your intention behind the words. You need to really let go or at least be willing to begin the process of letting go of your Money Blocks.

You are so powerful, more powerful than you realise. When you make the choice to let go of your money blocks, they will begin to dissolve away.

Some money blocks like to grip on for dear life, so you need to do this practice every day to chip away at them. Eventually your money blocks will dissolve with time, patience and love. Releasing your money blocks is a daily practice.

Step 3 Make the choice to have your Dreams Now – bring them into the present

Money manifestation works when you get 100% behind what you are asking for. You have to make a choice that you are going to do this and have this, even though you don’t know how. You need to decide that what you are asking for is going to be your reality, because you choose it to be so.

You do not need to know how you are going to make it happen. The how is up to The Universe and your Soul. All you need to do is decide and be willing to take the next steps forward towards your dreams.

You are the creator of your life. You create your life by getting clear on what you want and where you want to go. It’s time to get into the drivers’ seat of your life.

Bring Your Dreams Into The Present

When you think about your money goal, where is it? Is it in the future somewhere? Do you see or imagine your dream outside of you? Most people do.
The trick with money manifestation is to bring what you are asking for into the present, as if it’s real now. You become it now.

Most people say…

“I will be happy, peaceful when I have X, I will feel free when I have Y”.

The trick with manifesting what you desire is to start feeling what you want to feel NOW. So if you are asking to feel Joy, Freedom or Peace, start connecting to those feelings every day NOW.

As you become what you want NOW, you become a magnet to more of the same. This is how The Law of Attraction Works.

On a deeper level what you are doing with money manifestation is connecting to the truth of you. When you are aligned with your Soul and your purpose, you will feel Joyful, Free, Peaceful, Connected, Expansive and fulfilled. When you are feeling any negative emotions, it simply means that you have fallen out of alignment with yourself. It’s a sign something within needs your attention.

Exercise

Become The Vibrational Frequency of That Which You Desire

How would a person with X amount of money (your money goal) walk, talk, be? Become the energy of someone with that amount of money now. Your body knows how to do this. Sit, close your eyes and ask your body to become the vibrational frequency of a person with X amount of money. Then see what you feel!

Do this every day.

Step 4 Listen To Your Intuition

As soon as you ask for what you want, the answers come. The Universe will give you energetic breadcrumbs to guide you towards your dreams, but you have to listen. Your Soul, or Higher Self, will guide you forward.

The Universe and Your Higher Self speak to you in many subtle ways. You will get messages that lead you towards your dreams if you are listening and paying attention to those messages.

One of the main ways that The Universe speaks to you is through your intuition. You will get ideas, insights or awareness that are guiding you to the next step towards your dreams. But so often you will reject those ideas or insights as soon as they come it.

The key is to listen to the subtle messages from the world around you. The answers are there, but are you listening?

To help yourself listen to your intuition it helps to get still and quiet. Sit, breathe and tap into your inner knowing. I personally recommend a daily meditation practice.

Step 5 Take Guided Action

The very important step to realising your money goals is taking guided action. You need to take action on your intuitive ideas, or at least be willing to explore them more.

The key to guided action is taking action towards your dreams lead by your Higher Self and not from your Money Blocks aka your Ego.

Your Money Blocks will keep sneaking up to stop you in your tracks. They will feel very real. You must keep releasing them as they come up and not let them run your life anymore. Keep releasing your money blocks every day.

Your intuition will never speak to you in a fear based way. If your thoughts, feelings or emotions are fear based or negative in any way this is not your intuition speaking. Your intuition will be calm, clear and free from emotional drama.

You will realise your dreams one step at a time. Sometimes you will move forward with great leaps and bounds and sometimes you will move forward with many little (sometimes wobbly!) baby steps.

Please remember patience, trust, compassion and perseverance on your money manifestation journey.

Money Manifestation Daily Actions

1) Meditate:

To help you connect with your intuition I recommend meditating daily. To do this, sit quietly with your eyes shut and breathe. When your mind wanders, come back to your breath. Sit for a minimum of 10 minutes or until you feel your mind slow down. I personally recommend a minimum of 20 minutes a day. Your mind will wander! That’s normal. Just keep coming back to the breath, back into the present moment, when you notice your mind wandering.

When your mind has settled connect to your Money Goal and Your Money Fuel.

2) Ask The Universe and Your Soul:

What would it take to bring in X amount each month/year?

What would it take to feel, have, experience….?
(fill in the blank with your money fuel)

3) Money Block Release:

Anything and everything that is stopping or blocking me from welcoming my money goal and my money fuel into my life with ease, I let it go now.

4) Bring your dreams into the present.

Become the vibrational frequency of that which you desire. Imagine what it would feel like to have that amount of money. Bring up the feelings of your money fuel. Become it now.

5) Ask your intuition:

What action can I take now that will create the greatest result?

6) Take Guided Action

Listen to your intuition. Write down any ideas and take action on the next best step for you at this time on your journey.

Do this practice every day.

Your dreams are on the other side of your comfort zone. Moving beyond your comfort zone is not always comfortable, but so very worth it. I promise!

Never give up on your dreams. You are here to make a very important contribution to this world. Make the most out of what life has to offer you.

Much Love and Abundance,
Lara Waldman
The Horse Woman without a Horse

To master your money manifestation and discover more powerful exercises, tips and mind-shifts to increase your abundance check out Lara’s new book
‘Money Manifestation Mastery’ via this link:
http://larawaldman.com/book/

About Lara

Lara Waldman is The Abundance Activator. Lara is an Inspirational Speaker, Healer, Abundance Coach and Author of the book “Money Manifestation Mastery – 5 Steps To Abundance Activation”.
Lara empowers Female Entrepreneurs and Business Owners to attract more money into their life and business. She teaches women how to use Money Manifestation as a vehicle to fulfilling their Life’s Purpose and making the change they were born to make.

Connect with Lara:

Web: www.larawaldman.com
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