One of Many

Woman looking to create change

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10 rituals to support you when your world turns upside down

By

Kat Holden
Kat Holden
Kat has 20+ years of professional experience and has worked around the world in the private and public sector.She knows first hand the challenges that come with working in a highly competitive environment and dealing with stress, overwhelm and imposter syndrome - all the while trying to remain authentic to yourself.

Today, Kat works as one of the in-house coaches for One Of Many, alongside her own work where she coaches exceptional people all over the world, helping them to figure out how to define their lives in a positive, healthy and fulfilling way, helping them to discover their best selves and live their very best lives after their battle with cancer.
Kat Holden
Latest posts by Kat Holden (see all)

If you’ve experienced trauma of any kind, you know first hand how everything can change in the blink of an eye. It comes in many guises. It could be divorce, or death of a loved one, being made redundant, children leaving home or even a violent crime. For me it was a cancer diagnosis.

Whatever the catalyst, often the feeling is as though you’ve lost yourself. We get lost in fear and overwhelm, anger and even depression. It can feel like we are spinning out of control, that we are powerless and alone.

At a time when it’s so difficult to hold a thought, or have the strength to get out of bed and with our life spiralling, the most important first step is to reclaim a semblance of our strength both physically and emotionally.

The question is how?

My journey to thriving after trauma

As I sat in my oncologist’s office, doing my best to focus on his words but in reality just listening to white noise, feeling helpless and hopeless, he said something that snapped me out of my reverie:

“Are you listening to me Katrina? It’s really important for you to hear this… your survival is dependant on you seeing this treatment through to the end and it’s your responsibility to keep yourself as healthy as possible to be able to do so.”

My responsibility. My responsibility.

I kept turning those words over in my mind, at first feeling overwhelmed by them and then the realisation of what was happening.

The very clever oncologist had just shown me the way out of feeling disempowered and hopeless to empowered and knowing how I was going to play my part during this chapter of my life. And my focus was my vitality.

To feel empowered when our world is spinning out of control takes small consistent steps every day. It’s those steps that encourage us to get up, get dressed and live our best possible day.

Here are the ten daily rituals that took me from lost and overwhelmed to feeling healthy and strong.

10 rituals to support you when your world turns upside down

  1. Morning pages. On a good day, I wrote my morning pages, processing, ranting, raging, accepting. On a bad day, I focused on the mantra, ‘this time shall pass – just keep breathing’.
  2. Gentle exercise. I got outside every day – some days it was a 60 second walk to the gate, a 10 minute rest and then another 60 seconds back. On other days I could walk the 20 minutes to the park, the fresh air in my lungs, my mind focusing on the sky and the trees, feeling the wind on my face.
  3. Wholesome food. Take the chemicals out of your diet and stay hydrated. This part of my vitality plan was most difficult for me as the anti-sickness tablets never worked – I relied on Jo’s homemade recipe of 4 parts water, 1 part orange juice and a pinch of salt to keep my dialytes in check and the only food I could keep down were cream crackers, brazil nuts and extra strong mints – the later being my Mum’s unsuccessful solution to stop me from being sick.
  4. Allow others to help. A tough lesson for me. At the time, I was an independent corporate woman who knew all the answers. I had no idea how to be vulnerable, to ask for help, to share my fears, to show my real emotions. This chapter in my life shaped me and my relationships forever. By showing my vulnerability and finding the courage to allow loved ones to help, past hurts have been healed, love and acceptance shared, forgiveness given and received. Be brave, be you and accept that love and support from loved ones who are able to give. (That’s a whole other blog post – along with the kindness of strangers.)
  5. Mindfulness. Every day find 10 minutes to just sit and breathe. Our breath is our life force and when we are stressed we have a tendency to breath shallow and fast, some of us even hold our breath. These 10 minutes will slow your mind down and bring much needed calm to an anxious mind and body.
  6. Laughter. I guarantee you will laugh again and soon. You will find joy in the smallest of things. The restorative power of a funny film or book, listening to your favourite comedian, crying with laughter after falling down the hole in the bed after radiation treatment and having to be pulled out by two nurses… You will come through this time with moments and memories, stories and wisdom that will replenish you mind, body and soul.
  7. Love. Surround yourself with loved ones who uplift you, support you, bring you cake… the ones who bring normality into your current routine with stories of their days – the ones who don’t look at you with pity but remind you of your strength. The ones who make plans with you, who drive you to the beach, who pack blankets and pillows in the car because they know you’re going to sleep all the way home…
  8. Gratitude. The quickest and most joyful way to reignite your energy, to warm your heart, to bring clarity and appreciation for life. Whether you write in your journal or allow those thoughts to flow through your body – a few moments every day as a reminder of all you have will boost your vitality and pull you forward towards a brand new day.
  9. Rest. Good quality sleep may be elusive for a while and as it’s the corner stone to vitality, you must find a way to rest throughout the day. Whether that’s finding time to nap, or allowing others to cook the dinner whilst you have a bath, make sure you prioritise this time. And remember a relaxing wind-down routine at the end of the day can make a huge difference to your ability to fall asleep.
  10. Extra support. Whatever challenge you’re facing, or have faced, I highly recommend finding a counsellor or therapist who can help you make sense of it all and help you to heal. Our emotional resilience during any trauma is of upmost importance – it is this that takes us from surviving to thriving. The professional help I had during and after my cancer battle was life changing for me.

It was that safe space, support and the kindness that was shown to me that ignited a passion with me and became the driving force behind my own business as I went on to qualify as a coach, an art therapist and an EFT practitioner so I could support others in their success stories as they too came back to life.

What resources and rituals help you thrive?

These practices made all the difference to me. But I’d love to know your rituals – perhaps something that seems small, but made all the difference when times have been tough.

Share them in the comments below.

About Kat Holden

Kat has 20+ years of professional experience and has worked around the world in the private and public sector.  She knows first hand the challenges that come with working in a highly competitive environment and dealing with stress, overwhelm and imposter syndrome – all the while trying to remain authentic to yourself.

Kat began coaching over 10 years ago.  Her ah-ha moment came during 7 long years of serious illness.  It was then she discovered the power of coaching, personal development and modern psychology.   Unsurprisingly as Kat discovered who she was at her core, healed past traumas and fears, she grew stronger and began to thrive; her happiness and confidence exploded.   

Of course everyone around her wanted to know how this transformation came about including the doctors and specialists who had become an everyday part of life, so in 2014 Kat set up Kat Holden – Life After Cancer – Coaching & Consulting to revolutionise the way we live and work post cancer.    

Today, Kat works as one of the in-house coaches for One of many, alongside her own work where she coaches exceptional people all over the world, helping them to figure out how to define their lives in a positive, healthy and fulfilling way, helping them to discover their best selves and live their very best lives after their battle with cancer.

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7 tiny ways to stop feeling tired all the time

By

Joanna Martin
Joanna Martin
Founder at One of many
Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.
Joanna Martin
Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

As an in-house coach one of the most common challenges I see in my clients is a lack of energy. Most are combining multiple priorities: building a business whilst still in corporate life, raising a family, taking care of elderly parents, and doing their best to try and outrun that pesky inner critic. Is it any wonder so many of us feel as though we’re tired all the time?

I frequently ask, “When did you last stop or do something just for yourself? When did you last do anything to replenish?”

And the answer is always met with silence and then an embarrassed whisper of, “I can’t remember…”

Tired all the time… Does this sound familiar?

I’m just as guilty.

It seems our number one soft power principle of replenish, replenish, replenish is one of the hardest to allow.

What the bloody hell is that all about?

Well, I suppose I could write about all the challenges and excuses we make that stop us from being kind to ourselves, but quite frankly I’m too tired!

So instead I thought I’d share with you the fundamental principle to follow when you’re tired all the time.

“Just stop it!”

I’m kidding of course – kind of. Have you ever seen the comedy sketch with Bob Newhart – he plays a therapist imparting words of wisdom. It’s hilarious – and there’s more than a grain of truth in it.

Of course, yelling “stop it!” at ourselves when we know we’re already on the edge of burnout isn’t actually a very helpful approach. The thought of taking a whole day off, a week’s holiday, or even an entire lunch break can be enough to send us into a spiral of panic.

The secret to getting your energy back

So instead of exhausting yourself further, with radical lifestyle changes that will take even more energy to organise and implement, why not try a different approach?

When we’re running on empty and everything seems like a mountain to climb, sometimes the only way forward is with small acts of kindness everyday that will take you from overwhelmed and burning out to energised and vital.

Don’t know where to start? Try one of these tiny micro-acts of kindness.

7 tiny ways to stop feeling tired all the time

  1. Drink enough water. Fill up a glass and keep it on your desk – don’t forget to sip it throughout the day.
  2. Morning pages – the daily journaling practice that helps you offload, reflect and connect to yourself.
  3. Good quality sleep. If your worries are keeping you up at night, research some ways to help yourself get fully rested.
  4. Walking in nature, even if it’s just a brisk 20 minutes through the park on your way to work.
  5. Mindful breathing. There are lots of videos and apps that can help you find a 5 minute way to connect to your breath.
  6. Learning who and what you need to say no to. Setting boundaries is a powerful act of kindness to yourself.
  7. A good film or drama where you can just switch off. I’m very late to the party as I’ve only just discovered Call The Midwife – 50 minutes of loveliness and feel-good stories and I’m restored!

Where to begin

You might be thinking that one of those tiny actions would be the perfect place to start – but you might also have some better ideas of your own.

Give yourself permission to take a moment for yourself and your first act of kindness – go watch Bob Newhart, have a good giggle and then get a pen and paper.

Draw a line down the centre and in the left hand column brainstorm all the small acts you can do for yourself that will leave you feeling replenished.

Then, in the right hand column write down the boundaries you need to put in place so you’re able to take those baby steps back to life.

As you start to take care of yourself in tiny ways every day, you’ll find the balance gradually shifts. With more energy you’re better able to set boundaries, and so the cycle continues.

Share the kindness

If you know you could be a bit kinder to yourself, let’s help spread that commitment. Share ONE tiny act of kindness in the comments below, and let’s inspire each other to take that first baby step.

About Kat

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Guest blog: What menopause means

By

Alexandra Pope
Alexandra Pope
Alexandra Pope is co-director of Red School and co-author of the iconic and hugely celebrated book from Hay House, Wild Power: discover the magic of the menstrual cycle and awaken the feminine path to power.

Together with colleague and co-author, Sjanie Hugo Wurlitzer, she teaches a radical new approach to women’s health and wellbeing; creativity and leadership; and spiritual life based on the power of our menstruality consciousness.

With a background in teaching, psychotherapy and hypnotherapy and drawing on 40 years collective experience pioneering this emerging field of menstruality, they offer workshops, online courses, training and coaching worldwide based on the power of the menstrual cycle, and the developmental journey from menarche to menopause. Find out more at www.redschool.net
Alexandra Pope
Latest posts by Alexandra Pope (see all)

“Menopause is an opportunity”. Let’s be honest, if you ask most people what menopause means, you won’t often hear that said!

For those of you in menopause right now, you may either be scratching your head wondering what I am on… or throwing epithets of rage at me.

Bear with me!

What menopause means: a different way of thinking about “The Change”

I am not discounting the very real suffering that too many of us experience when we begin to go through the menopause.

However, I believe there is also something very powerful trying to happen at menopause. If you know how to connect with that, menopause can be experienced as a path that supports you to refine and hone who you truly are. And therein lies great freedom.

Menopause is an ending, a death process in short. Your body and soul go through a transformation, and like the caterpillar going into the cocoon, as you enter menopause you go to ‘mush’ first.

Much of the powerful emotion that can emerge at menopause is connected to feelings that can emerge with ‘endings’. You are shedding who you think you are and for awhile may have no idea what it is that you want, or even who you are. You are left feeling psychologically exposed. This is all normal and it is the prelude to waking up to what you are truly about.

This is the opportunity of menopause – the opportunity to know and accept yourself deeply.

To help harness this opportunity, you have two particular superpowers that awaken at menopause very strongly:

1. Inner knowing

As you start to let go into menopause, you will notice the veils fall from your eyes. By that I mean you will suddenly feel, sense, see and know things that you didn’t or couldn’t before.

You’ll know things that you need to do, however difficult or challenging. You’ll just know and can’t argue with them! You have both a deep instinctual knowing and can really see-through both yourself and the illusions of society, particularly all the subtle and not so subtle ways that patriarchy operates. A true ‘emperor’s got no clothes’ moment.

And you’ll have zero tolerance for it!

2. The power of No

You may well find yourself saying No to just about everything.

This is not ‘being negative’, it is about you knowing what is no longer relevant, what you do not want in your life. Be heartened by the words of Warren Buffet who said that ‘the really successful person says NO to practically everything’ and harness this force.

It’s helping you to clear the ground of all those things that aren’t really you anymore, or no longer float your boat, even as you might, for instance, be really good at a certain job.

This process can also include a literal clearing of stuff and people from your life. Some relationships bite the dust at this point. In clearing the ground you create space for something new to emerge or for what is most essential or important in you to flourish. You will find this voice of ‘No’ is uncompromising. But remember:

Behind the No lies a great and powerful Yes to yourself.

The shadow side of your new power

Like all powers, these energies have their shadow side. If you are not sufficiently mindful and self caring, the inner sight and knowing can simply be experienced as overwhelm, grief or rage (the latter two may happen regardless, but you don’t want to get stuck there). And the ‘No’ power can simply come out as reactivity, irritation, frustration and anger.

To activate these powers in a wholesome way you need time and space for yourself. Time and space for yourself are the commodities most often in short supply. You may be someone who still has children at home, elderly parents to care for, a demanding job or any combination of these. In other words, someone who has precious little time for yourself.

But here’s the rub, the one thing that your soul demands of you at menopause is time and space for you.

Time to simply be, with no responsibility for anyone.

Without it you will feel as though you are going mad, with it you will start to slowly and quietly feel the order and meaning of this powerful life transition get to work.

So how are you going to get it?

Here are 4 powerful ways to begin to embrace what menopause means, and tap into the deep well of power that is waiting to be drawn on.

1. Be aware of what is happening

Consciously name what is happening to yourself, metaphorically turn and face the change and greet it with dignity.

2. Recognise that some things will need to change

Be kind to yourself – cut yourself some slack. Do not hold the same expectations that you would normally have of yourself. No more ‘going the extra mile’ for anybody. What you do and who you are will still be enough. You need your energy for yourself now.

3. Start small

Give yourself microdoses, or one percent, of sacred time for yourself with plentiful doses of silence, and no, emphatically, no ‘to do ‘ lists or demands on yourself.

One percent is always doable. It may not be perfect but it’s something and you will begin to feel moments of relief coming into the system. Schedule it in. It might be no more than half an hour at first, but it’s all yours. Sacrosanct. The more you taste it, the easier it will be to claim. You’ll get ruthless with your schedule as you wield that ‘No’ power!

4. Write it out

Keep a journal to hand to help you drop your bundle – sometimes writing everything that’s in you head is a way of slowing down and putting the stuff of the world to one side temporarily.

And as you let go, your inner life starts to speak…emotions, feelings, memories, realisation, revelations emerge. You might feel you want to note some of that. It’s your call. I impose no rules on you in your alone time.

Menopause: A time to come home to yourself

Think of menopause as an opportunity to truly come home to yourself, get some deep rest and repair, and receive utter clarity about who you are and what you truly want. This is the recipe for experiencing a deeply creative and meaningful post menopause life.

Want to learn more about the power of menopause?

If this article has seeded something in you, and you’d like encouragement and support from a like-minded group of women as you undergo this powerful transition, we invite you to check out our online programme, “Menopause: The Great Awakener”. To find out more and listen to a free introductory webinar on the topic, click here: www.redschoolmenopause.com

About Alexandra

Alexandra PopeAlexandra Pope is co-director of Red School and co-author of the iconic and hugely celebrated book from Hay House, Wild Power: discover the magic of the menstrual cycle and awaken the feminine path to power.

Together with colleague and co-author, Sjanie Hugo Wurlitzer, she teaches a radical new approach to women’s health and wellbeing; creativity and leadership; and spiritual life based on the power of our menstruality consciousness.

With a background in teaching, psychotherapy and hypnotherapy and drawing on 40 years collective experience pioneering this emerging field of menstruality, they offer workshops, online courses, training and coaching worldwide based on the power of the menstrual cycle, and the developmental journey from menarche to menopause. Find out more at
www.redschool.net

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How to motivate yourself to exercise

By

Joanna Martin
Joanna Martin
Founder at One of many
Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.
Joanna Martin
Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

You already know what you need to do to stay healthy. Eat your greens, move your body, get enough sleep… And yet, so many of us find ourselves lapsing when it comes to taking care of our bodies. Today I want to share a simple mindset technique for how to motivate yourself to exercise, change your diet, or embrace whatever healthy habit is top of your list.

The most effective way to make change

Karen, one of the ladies in our community, asked a great question in our Facebook Group. She wanted to know the group’s tips on finding ‘towards motivation’ when it comes to health.

If you’re not familiar with the distinction, ‘towards’ motivation is a way to describe something that inspires you to take steps in the direction of a specific goal.

For example, if you’re stopping smoking you might be motivated by:

  • Being a great example of healthy living for my kids
  • Enjoying extra energy and good health
  • Treating myself to a monthly massage with your extra cash

It’s different from ‘away’ motivation, which focuses on what you’re leaving behind. In the above example, that would be:

  • No longer being a bad role model to my kids
  • Getting rid of that persistent cough and continual feeling of tiredness
  • Stopping wasting money on cigarettes

You can see the difference, right?

Among other things, “away” motivation tends to wear off once you’ve taken the first steps. (When your cough is gone, that’s no longer driving you forward.)

Whereas, ‘towards’ motivation tends to build and strengthen as time goes on, making the change more likely to stick.

Why motivation to get healthy is hard

Now, health can be a particularly tricky area to find our “towards” motivation for, partly because of the huge role our media culture plays in our relationship to our bodies.

For example, in a 2016 study by Dove, researchers found that one out of every two Australian women reported feeling worse about themselves after looking at images of attractive women in magazines.

When we’re often encouraged to compare ourselves to unattainable physical standards, it’s natural for us to start to frame our healthy choices in negative ways.

“I need to lose weight round my middle.”

“I hate how my arms look in sleeveless dresses.”

“I wish I could stop eating so much junk food.”

This kind of self-talk breaks my heart. It adds to the countless ways women often blame, criticise and find fault with ourselves. What’s more, it often does very little to motivate us to make change.

After all, who’d want to show up for an exercise class with a sharp-tongued drill sergeant, constantly pointing out your perceived faults and shortcomings? (OK, I know the brutal bootcamp thing works for some people – but most of us could do with a bit more support, right?)

How to motivate yourself without criticism

So, when Karen reached out for help finding ‘towards’ motivation when it came to her health she was absolutely on the right track.

As always happens, when someone in our tribe reaches out for help, the women around her rally.

And the responses to this question were brilliant examples of the different ways we each find our own ways to thrive.

Here are 5 that might help you. As you read through each one, think about how this might apply to you right now, today, or this week. How could they support you to feel great about making positive choices when it comes to your health?

1. Focus on the present – not the future

It’s easy to get hung up on future outcomes when it comes to things like doing exercise or eating healthily. But what about how good they feel in the present? Enjoying delicious food, having fun playing frisbee in the park or letting yourself relax into a yoga class – these moments can be their own reward. The clear-headed feeling you get after going out for a brisk walk or the emotional release of a high-energy workout are worth savouring in themselves.

What activities leave you feeling great? How can you build more of them into your life?

2. When you’re healthy, you can give your best

If you’re a leader aiming to make a difference, you’ll be at your most effective when you’re feeling physically fit. That might mean balancing your mood to enable you to lead your team through challenges; making sure you’re really able to make the most of your time; or just having the energy to approach your mission with a positive mindset.

What’s the contribution only you can make, and how will being in full health support that?

3. Taking care of your body is a form of gratitude

However badly we treat our bodies, or unkindly we think about them, they are astonishing, complex, beautiful systems. Every day of your life your heart’s been pumping blood around your body. Your brain’s been absorbing and processing information. Your digestive system has been turning food into incredible cellular chemistry, giving you the energy to keep going; your organs have been processing and integrating a vast array of processes.

How can you show your incredible body how much you value and appreciate it?

4. Living longer means more fun, impact, fulfillment…

Staying healthy is more likely to result in a longer, happier life. If you have kids, they’re often a strong motivator. Who doesn’t want to get to know the amazing grownups we’re helping to emerge? Then there are the sunsets to watch, changes to witness, projects to bring to fruition… not to mention gorgeous dinners, earth-shattering orgasms, fascinating conversations…

What do you want to experience more of in the years to come? How can your choices today contribute to even more of them?

5. Enjoy the benefits of good health

When we focus on things like ‘losing weight’ or ‘looking better’ we often miss out on the real tangible experience of good health. Things like feeling grace and ease when you do things; the sense of confidence and vitality that comes when you’re on top form, or knowing that you’re nourishing and taking care of yourself. These things have nothing to do with your physical ability, the numbers on a scale, or what you see on the outside.

What does true health and vitality mean for you? How does it feel, and what does it allow you to do?

Thriving women make powerful leaders

Supporting women to feel true vitality is an important part of how we equip female leaders to make a difference. If you’d like to have a chat to one of our team about the kind of support we offer, click here to arrange a time to talk.

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many™ women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

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Guest Post: 5 Pelvic Floor Myths – Revealed

By

Joanna Martin
Joanna Martin
Founder at One of many
Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.
Joanna Martin
Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

This is a guest post by Wendy Powell.

I want to get real about all things pelvic floor and clear up some of the myths you may have heard about these muscles. When it comes to women’s health, especially pelvic health, there’s a lot of myths that need busting. I want to help you to get informed and arm you with the facts, so you can feel in control and empowered. Here are 5 pelvic floor myths we commonly hear from the women around us – and the truth behind them.

What is your pelvic floor?

Good question! Here’s a quick rundown in case you’re not 100% clear on what we mean when we talk about your pelvic floor.

Your pelvic floor is responsible for holding your pelvic organs in place. It’s made up of the muscles, ligaments and tissues that support your Bladder Uterus and your Bowel and the three openings – Your urethra, vagina and anus.

There are a lot of misconceptions and myths that go around about taking care of your pelvic floor, and some of the symptoms and challenges that can be associated with it. Read on to find out the truth about this much-misunderstood area of the body…

Here are the 5 pelvic floor myths about to get BUSTED!

MYTH 1 – Leaking is just something that just comes with age.

Nope! Leaking is not something you have to just accept as you age. There is no reason why you cannot have a strong and functional pelvic floor, whatever your age.

(And yes, even if you’ve had children…)

MYTH 2 – It’s okay to wee a little bit when I sneeze or laugh.

Total myth! And one that’s being pushed on the regular by big corporations, selling incontinence products. The messaging around incontinence is all wrong. It’s never okay to just mask the problem with a pad. Pads serve a purpose in the short term, but the “oops moment” messaging isn’t helpful to women or conducive to an effective recovery. It’s spreading the belief that leaking is inevitable and something, as women, that we have to put up with and keep quiet about.

You don’t need to be discreet about it, there is help for you and opening up conversations about it helps in spreading the message and destroying the taboo! If you are weeing a little or a lot when you shouldn’t be, you can see a Women’s Health Physio or find out more about what you can do below.

MYTH 3 – Pain during sex is normal.

Okay. Let’s get one thing straight here. Pain-free intercourse is the VERY LEAST you should expect from your sex life. Your enjoyment and comfort are important. You deserve to feel like a goddess, pain-free, with all the orgasms!

Painful sex can be a result of a hypertonic (too tight) pelvic floor. Focusing on engaging and releasing your pelvic floor correctly will help, and seeking a referral to a Women’s Health Physiotherapist should be next on your to-do list.

MYTH 4 – A few Kegels will cure all my pelvic floor issues.

Kegels and other traditional pelvic floor exercises, involving squeezing, are an important starting point but sometimes they may not be enough, or you may not be performing them correctly.

There is a really important relaxation phase that’s often missing along with postural and alignment adjustments. Watch my free 6 minute pelvic floor workout to help you master this.

MYTH 5 – If I ignore this, it’ll go away.

Something that starts as a little leak can often lead to something more serious, like prolapse or hernia. It’s important to address any symptoms you have, sooner rather than later. You can and will get a more functional pelvic floor with effective exercises designed to reconnect with and strengthen those muscles.

Every woman deserves a body that works. A functional body means you can do you whatever you were put on this earth to do, in the best way possible.

Learn how to stop leaks and strengthen your pelvic floor with a step by step guide and video here.

About Wendy

Wendy is a globally recognised leading voice on women’s health and wellness, bringing education and awareness about physiological and emotional postpartum issues to a wider audience. She is Founder and CEO of world best selling postpartum recovery program, MUTU System, and accredited education provider, MUTU Pro. She works alongside pelvic health specialists around the world including Physiotherapists, Physical Therapists and sex therapists, as well as NHS Trusts and hospital Physio departments to offer a trusted and credible resources on postpartum health.

After a decade as an in-demand certified pregnancy and postpartum specialist personal trainer in London, Wendy created and launched the first MUTU System online training program in 2010. Since then the global brand and community has grown and flourished, offering expertise and support to women who want to heal their core and pelvic floor and get strong, fit and confident. The highly engaged, body positive and supportive MUTU Mama online community offers women a trusted, safe space of education and empowerment.

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A nifty trick for creating healthy habits

By

Joanna Martin
Joanna Martin
Founder at One of many
Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.
Joanna Martin
Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

It was seriously cold. Think, minus 28 degrees Celsius. My eyelashes were frozen… my hair was frozen… and there, on the back of a sled, whizzing through the breathtaking Swedish scenery, I learned a really nifty trick when it comes to developing healthy habits.

From a husky, of all things.

Yup, my 2018 trip to Sweden with the Empress collective of female entrepreneurs certainly came with some unexpected results! And I want to share one of them with you today – because it might just make the difference when it comes to any healthy habits you’re planning to create.

What a husky has to teach you about habits

Just in case you’re not au fait with dog-sledding terminology (you mean that’s not one of the many strings to your bow?), here’s how it works.

The sled is made up of a team of dogs. To the untrained eye, it looks like they’re all pelting madly in the direction you want to be heading.

But, as in any effective team, every member plays a different role. There are some that are great for balancing the sled on turns and corners; others who provide the “muscle” that keeps the pace up and the momentum going.

And right at the front, are the “Lead Dogs”. These are the ones that caught my imagination – and I’m going to explain how they relate to you, I promise!

Lead dogs are great at listening to and responding to commands. They’re fearless, and motivated to keep bounding forward even when the going gets tough. In short, they’re the dogs which pull all the others behind them, keeping them on course.

And this is where your habits come in. You see, there are certain needs which I now think of as “lead needs”. They pull everything else behind them.

For me, a really key need is sleep. If I have a good night’s sleep, I’m more likely to meet all my other needs more effectively – drink enough water, do my morning pages, make a healthy breakfast… everything else follows on from there.

Why “lead needs” make a difference

In the words of Sarah Stokey, of Turning Heads Kennel in Alaska,

“Sled dogs with good attitudes see obstacles as challenges to overcome and they thrive in adversity. Great lead dogs do not back down when the going gets tough, rather that is when they shine the most!”

Your “Lead Needs” will operate in exactly the same way. When life gets full and challenges arise, embedding these key habits will help support you in every other area of your life.

So when you’ve figured out your “lead needs”, how do you build habits around them that will really stick?

Habits that stick

In his excellent book The Power of Habit, Charles Duhigg calls these kinds of foundational needs “Touchstone habits”. They’re the habits which have a knock-on effect on multiple other areas of your life.

When it comes to getting these behaviours in place, he suggests a 3 step process:

  • Cue
  • Reward
  • Routine

Now in my experience, the “cue” part bears careful thinking about.

Research shows us that if we’ve thought through in really specific detail exactly what we’ll do when it comes to a desired behaviour, we’re much more likely to follow it through.

Thinking through the real-life scenario of what you’ll do as part of your new habit can also help you identify the little tweaks that will allow you to craft a truly effective trigger for what you want to do.

Creating an effective trigger

Let me give you an example. A while back I had a goal to drink more water. I came up with a great cue – every time I took a loo break, I’d have a drink of water. The more hydrated I am, the more I need to go, so it’s a virtuous circle, right?

Only, when I thought through the actual step-by-step of how that would work, I realised that something often stopped me. I didn’t want to go into the kitchen when Rosie, my little girl, was playing – it would disrupt my work time and distract her from her activities too.

So my game-changing action was to leave a jug of water in the hallway, so I didn’t need to go into the kitchen. That made the cue I’d chosen really effective.

Maybe for you you’d love to get to bed earlier.

You think through what needs to happen – and realise that when it doesn’t it’s usually because you’ve been on your phone, scrolling through social media and falling down those “internet rabbit holes” that suck us in.

The solution might be to set an alarm on your phone for an hour before bedtime and at that point, literally switch off the wi-fi router. That’s a powerful trigger for your bedtime routine, with a reward of a lovely herbal tea in your favourite mug, to help you drift off.

So here’s my suggestion if you’d like to implement a new habit:

1. Identify your Lead Need

(It might be a Touchstone like exercise, which research shows has several beneficial effects or something you know makes a huge difference to you personally.)

2. Think through the actions you’ll need to take

Include what blocks or challenges you can head off before they stop you

3. Pick your trigger and set yourself up to succeed

Make sure you choose a lovely reward – it doesn’t need to cost money or be complicated – to celebrate your new habit!

I’d love to know how this works out! Let me know in the comments, and share your healthy habits with others.

Not sure what your lead would be?

If you know you’d love to feel healthier and more energised, but aren’t sure where to begin, you might be interested in joining us for BeVital – a 2-day retreat where you’re guided through an in-depth look at how you can bring more vitality into your life. It’s definitely not a bootcamp, a diet or an exercise regime – more a gentle, supportive transformational process designed to give you back control.

For more info, click here to arrange a call with the team and find out all the details.

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

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How to support a friend with burnout

By

Joanna Martin
Joanna Martin
Founder at One of many
Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.
Joanna Martin
Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

Research from Montreal University earlier this year revealed once more something most of us are anecdotally aware of: women are far more likely to suffer from work-related burnout than men. Even if burnout hasn’t affected you directly, you’re almost certain to come across a woman experiencing it at some point: whether it’s your sister, your cousin, your old school friend or that colleague who never stopped working (until she had to).

So when it strikes, how can we make a difference to the amazing women around us who find themselves at the point of burnout? Are there things we can say or do to help support each other and avoid getting to it in the first place?

It’s worth noting that if someone you know is having more serious challenges, or isn’t being supported in any other way, it’s important for them to receive appropriate help. That might mean talking to their GP, accessing Occupational Health support via work, or contacting a professional who’s equipped to give them the support they need.

But outside of that, woman to woman, there’s an awful lot you can do to make a real difference to someone who’s struggling. Here are 5 places to start:

  1. Listen

I mean, really listen. Not while you’re scrolling through Facebook; not while you’re ‘just finishing this one email’. Turn off your devices, go somewhere quiet if you can (or use headphones if you’re on your mobile!) and give your friend the space to talk about what’s going on. In our Women’s coach training, we call this “devoted listening” – and it’s such a powerful thing to do.

For lots of us, resisting the urge to dive in with suggestions can be challenging. When we’re used to solving problems, from sales strategy to screaming toddlers, we can find ourselves locked in “solution” mode.

But feeling heard and acknowledged is a really important part of fostering true relationship, and in allowing each other to connect to our own wisdom.

So make some time to listen, and allow your friend to share exactly what’s happening for them, without interruptions.

2. Practice observation

When you’re talking to someone who’s going through burnout, it’s really important to give them space to talk. What can also be helpful is to get curious – put yourself in “observer” mode. Your aim isn’t to interrogate or criticise them, but you can gently reflect back what you’re noticing or hearing.

For example, you might notice that as they talk they’re repeatedly referring to times when they dropped everything to deal with someone else’s emergency.

Lovingly pointing that out, without emotion or judgment – “It sounds as though you’re often having to chair the team meeting at the last minute when Fred can’t make it” rather than “God, Fred’s always letting you down isn’t he?” – can be a really respectful way to help them connect to their own guidance.

The other important thing to bear in mind is our tendency to want to help others, which can often come in the form of “rescuing” them from a situation by taking it on ourselves.

Needless to say, adopting their stress as your own won’t help either of you. Powerful listening and gentle reflection of what’s happening is the most compassionate way to get truly present to what’s happening, without disempowering or patronising.

3. Signpost where you can

As your friend talks, it may become clear that there’s somewhere they could access more help from.

Maybe they’re finding it hard to stand up for themselves and set boundaries; they could really do with someone to delegate household chores to, or they’re in need of an amazing PA to share some of the business load with them.

When you’re in the thick of things, just looking for a solution can feel like a mountain to climb. With their permission, ask if there’s anything you can do to help them find the support they need.

Be specific – “Would you like me to find the phone number of a local cleaner who could pop in for an hour a week?”, for example, or “Shall I ask my amazing accountant to email you about setting up a meeting?”

Your aim isn’t to add more things to your friend’s to-do list – and if what she needs is time to rest and do nothing, it’s really important to respect that. But if you can help her connect to the support that could really make a difference, you might find that’s the greatest gift you can give.

4. Come back to Love

The 5 Women’s PowerTypes™ are our guides to stepping into our uniquely female leadership – and Mother is the PowerType that’s most compassionate and caring when it comes to the people in our lives.

Healthy Mother energy is able to hold unconditional love for those close to us (without depleting herself or moving into self-sacrifice.)

That means letting your friend know you’re there for her, you value her, and you love her just as she is – no matter how she’s feeling, or what she thinks she’s failed at.

It’s also important to remember to take time to replenish yourself. If you’re taking care of someone in your life, it can be emotionally exhausting, so make sure you give yourself space to fill up and restore your energy.

It will enable you to be the best support possible for them as they move out of burnout and back to healing.

5. Help them stop it happening again

Many women in our community describe burnout as a wake up call – and a catalyst for them to make changes in their life to stop it happening again.

When the time is right, helping your friend to explore the lessons a challenging experience has brought them, and reassuring them that they’re not alone in having gone through it, can be a really kind thing to do.

Whether it’s shifting careers, balancing responsibilities or restoring healthier boundaries, knowing we’re supported by others has a huge impact on our recovery, resilience and ability to thrive after a setback like burnout.

Are you a natural helper?

If you’re a born supporter who loves helping women get their mojo back after a challenge, or be kind to themselves during times of stress or burnout, have you ever considered becoming a coach?

Coaches help women with all kinds of challenges – overwhelm and burnout are just one of them – and training to provide this kind of support can lead to an incredibly rewarding career if you enjoy interacting with and empowering other women.

You can find out more about our Coaching Certification program by watching our free online training, The Secret To Coaching Women – click here to book your spot.

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many™ women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

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Mindfulness: where to start

By

Joanna Martin
Joanna Martin
Founder at One of many
Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.
Joanna Martin
Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

Mindfulness is the practice of bringing awareness to the present moment, or what is actually happening. It can be easier said than done – most of us spend a lot of our time either processing what has happened in the past, or projecting and planning the future. Here are some tips if you’re curious about mindfulness: where to start, how to come back to being mindful if you find yourself caught up in old patterns, and why it can be such a powerful practice.

Why mindfulness?

Mindfulness has been practiced for thousands of years and forms an important part of the Buddhist tradition, where it takes the form of meditation. Other common ways to experience mindfulness include yoga, mindful eating, classes, and online courses and apps. Since the 1970s, it’s been increasingly used within Western medicine as a way to reduce stress, anxiety and depression.

In the UK, mindfulness combined with Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is currently recommended by the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) for the prevention of relapse in recurrent depression.

Many people have reported that mindfulness has helped reduce stress and anxiety and enabled them to cope better with the demands of their busy lives.

In the words of our Head Coach Annie Stoker, mindfulness is

“A tool to become totally aware in the present moment, feel radically alive and completely open to your own experience. Not only can life become more vivid, enjoyable and interesting, but mindfulness also brings the opportunity for profound healing of unhelpful mental and emotional patterns.”

Mindfulness: Where to start?

If you’re curious about mindfulness, and how it could have an impact on your life, it’s important to remember that mindfulness is most effective when it’s used as a practice: something you do regularly, ideally daily, even if it’s only for a few minutes at a time.

If you’re someone who tends to dive into new ideas you might be tempted to sign up for a week-long retreat, or commit to an hour of mindfulness every morning at dawn. Those things can be great, but can be hard to keep up over the long term, which is how you’ll receive the best benefit.

Here are three ways to start introducing mindfulness into your life.

1. Start with a plan

If mindfulness is a practice you’ve been thinking about trying, start by planning how you’re going to incorporate it into your day.

Like exercise, mindfulness isn’t something that will create lasting change overnight, so think about how you could realistically include it in your life.

Are there particular times when you know you’ll be able to create the space to change into a different mindset?

Here are some ideas for how to bring mindfulness into your day:

  • Get up slightly earlier each day and practice mindfulness in the quiet of the morning
  • If you make a regular journey, like a commute or school pickup, commit to spending some time being mindful at the beginning or end
  • Practice mindful eating for a meal, snack or cup of tea each day
  • Give yourself a few moments of mindfulness before you go to bed
  • Instead of listening to music or podcasts, try incorporating mindfulness into your regular exercise routine: walking, running or yoga

2. Be consistent, not perfect

A lot of us have the impression that the “perfect” way to be mindful involves smiling peacefully to yourself as you connect to your inner sense of zen.

Well, sometimes that can be the case – but mindfulness is an invitation to connect to the present moment and really become aware of what you’re experiencing, both in your body and your mind. Which, unless you’re some kind of saint, won’t always be calm and serene! In fact, you might be experiencing anxiety, sadness, anger or frustration.

The point isn’t to “fix” what you’re feeling, but to become aware of it.

So don’t be tempted to skip a session if you’re not in the ‘right’ frame of mind. The purpose of the practice is to become aware of how you are in that moment.

If you’re feeling stressed or worried, give yourself the space to pay attention to exactly how that’s showing up (hunched shoulders? churning tummy?) for the time you’ve allocated to yourself.

It’s the commitment to pausing and paying attention at moments of tension that can be the most powerful way to change our patterns.

3. Notice what changes

When you’ve started a new activity, there are two benefits to noticing how it’s impacting you: it can motivate you to continue, and it can also show you where you might want to change your approach.

If you don’t do it already, journalling first thing in the morning (“morning pages” as taught by Julia Cameron in The Artist’s Way) is a fantastic tool for tracking your emotions and recording how you’re doing when you make changes in your life.

Notice if after a few weeks or months mindfulness has an impact on how you’re responding to challenges or upsets, or your approach to what’s going on in your life.

Ask yourself if practicing mindfulness has felt challenging at all, and whether it’s time to make any changes.

For example:

  • Could you change the time you’re practicing? Perhaps you’re too tired at night and it would work better for you to get up a bit earlier so you can be mindful before work
  • Could you set up prompts to help you be more consistent? An alarm on your phone, or an app that might support you if you find yourself forgetting or skipping sessions?
  • Could you find support or training? A local class, coach or online group to answer questions and help overcome the feeling of ‘not doing it right’?

When you just don’t have time

If you’re thinking “I’d love to make some time to be mindful – but I barely have five minutes to myself these days” then it might be time to create some time to nourish yourself before things get too much.

BeFruitful is our signature time management program designed by women, for women – and we promise it will help you find an extra 5 hours in your week, at least. Read the full details and book your place on this life-changing training by clicking here.

Not every approach works for every woman. But unless you give it a try, you won’t know if this is a technique that might make all the difference. With the current levels of stress, anxiety and burnout in women it’s vital that we each find the ways that work best for us to maintain our wellbeing and take care of our physical and mental health.

Have you tried mindfulness? How did you get started, and do you have any tips to share with anyone who’s curious about bringing it into their lives? Let us know in the comments below.

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many™ women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

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How is wellness different from health?

By

Joanna Martin
Joanna Martin
Founder at One of many
Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.
Joanna Martin
Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

When it comes to taking care of yourself, making sure you’re in optimum health has got to be a priority for all of us.

It’s fundamental, isn’t it – if we’re not physically doing OK, there’s no way we can perform at our best intellectually, emotionally, or spiritually. If you’re sick, injured or unwell, you’re probably not going to do much at all.

But when it comes to looking after ourselves there are a lot of different concepts floating around. It can start to get confusing.

How is wellness different from health? What’s really necessary and what’s a luxury busy women can’t afford? Here’s what you need to know.

Health: the foundation of it all

When we talk about health, we’re looking at the basics. Are you well in yourself – not fighting a virus, rundown to the point of exhaustion, or battling a chronic illness that won’t go away?

Health is often defined as a state in which we’re not suffering from any illness. In that sense, we can end up describing health by virtue of what it isn’t. So if we’re trying to be healthy, we’re essentially trying to be “not sick”.

It’s a classic “away from” motivation, because it comes from a wish to move away from the outcome we don’t want – in this case, being unwell in some way.

The trouble is, this kind of “away from” motivation can be limiting, because when the immediate impulse has passed, our momentum drops off. It’s the kind of thinking that can lead us to make all kinds of positive changes in our lives when we have a bit of a health scare, or when someone close to us gets a scary diagnosis. We don’t want that to happen to us, and so we vow off the sugar and the junk and start juicing like our lives depend on it.

But when things have improved – the flu that laid you up for a week passes, or you don’t get the bad news you’ve been dreading – your drive to maintain these changes wanes too.

Of course, the wish not to get sick might be strong enough to keep you motivated to make positive choices indefinitely. But for even the strongest willed of us, it’s a challenging way to maintain discipline.

Have you ever been on a real health kick and then gone on holiday, felt great, and proceeded to massively overdo it on the afternoon glasses of rosé and sugary desserts?

It might well have been because your motivation to live healthily was all about avoiding feeling bad. Relax somewhere beautiful, and you’re feeling blissed out – so you’ve got no incentive to stick to your plans.

Shifting our thinking: the wellness perspective

This is where it can be helpful to think about a word that’s being used more and more often these days: wellness. Wellness, or wellbeing, is how we describe a state that’s more than just the absence of sickness.

It’s a positive state of true vitality: rather than “not feeling tired”, you have bags of energy to achieve everything you want to. You’re not only meeting your basic needs, you’re actually getting the best of what you need in abundant qualities.

When you meet someone who’s not just baseline healthy, but is really thriving, you can sense it. Their eyes shine, they’re quick thinking, and you find yourself thinking “I want what she’s got”.

Thinking about our physical needs in terms of wellness moves our motivation into a “towards” framework. We want to exercise, meditate, eat healthily and make sure we’re hydrated not because we don’t want to get sick, but because we want to really feel great, all the time.

So when you’re offered an extra glass of wine with dinner, you say no because you’re looking forward to feeling fresh and clear headed in the morning – not because you’re avoiding a hangover. Same outcome, different motivations.

Of course, there are lots of other ways we can distinguish health from wellness, and countless ways of ensuring you feel at your best. But this towards/away from distinction can be a helpful place to start when it comes to considering how you take care of yourself, and what outcome you want.

Don’t you deserve to enjoy more than just the absence of illness, but instead to experience true vitality and joy? It’s certainly the way you’ll have the biggest positive effect on those around you, in your family, community and professional life.

We explore the different kinds of motivation as well as how to make sure your needs are met so that you can thrive in our life-changing 12 week program Be Powerful: Unleash the real you. Click here if you’d like to find out more.

How about you?

Is wellness a concept that’s a part of your life, or do you prefer to think about being healthy? These terms often get used interchangeably, so I’m curious to know what you think.

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many™ women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

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Guest blog: How to heal burnout

By

Elaine Wilkins
Elaine Wilkins
Founder at The Chrysalis Effect
Elaine Wilkins is the multi-award winning Founder and author of The Chrysalis Effect, first ever accredited training in ME, CFS and Fibro Prevention and Recovery, building an international network of experts on fatigue recovery. She is also a round table mentor for One of many. The Chrysalis Effect Online Recovery Programme for fatigue and fibromyalgia recovery is currently helping over 2600 people in 24 countries with their recovery.
Elaine Wilkins
Latest posts by Elaine Wilkins (see all)

There is a lot written about burnout and adrenal fatigue. The peak age of onset of fatigue related illness is people between the ages of 20 – 40, 82% of whom are women. Women just like you, who live busy, full lives with families and careers. Women who move out of their body and live in that headspace of tasks, responsibility and juggling time. Women who find they can’t get out of bed one day and say, ‘I just never thought it could happen to me’.

The 82% statistic only exists because we get so used to suppressing or over-riding the early warning symptoms our body sends. It signals the need for us to slow down via a headache, a feeling of overwhelm or a bloated gut. It is whispering the need to make some important changes.

It’s not just us, we get used to our friends and colleagues saying how ‘crazy busy’ they are, and how they long to stop but can’t. The biggest problem is, ‘out of balance life’ has becomes our society’s norm. Our bodies are amazing and as women we are incredibly resourceful, so we tend to adapt to problems as they arise and take on more and more. The difficulty comes when curve balls like a relationship breakdown, bereavement, financial crises or a virus hit us at a time when we have depleted our reserves.

Taking a moment to identify any physical ‘Early Warning Signs’ you might be experiencing and taking a quick glance at the checklist of the most common ‘Coping Mechanisms’ will be a useful snapshot of how you are taking care of yourself right now and whether it’s time to make some beneficial changes.

Early Warning Signs- Are you experiencing any of these regularly?

  • Headaches increasing in frequency and severity
  • Feeling stressed with normal workload
  • Sudden bouts of total exhaustion often before you are due to do something you don’t enjoy
  • Fuzzy head/poor concentration
  • Feeling overwhelmed
  • Sleep problems
  • Anxiety, busy racing mind
  • Bloating/ Irritable Bowel syndrome
  • Pins and needles in face
  • Unexplained pain in joints or muscles
  • Palpitations
  • Waking exhausted
  • Migraine
  • Vertigo
  • Short term memory problems
  • Poor word recall
  • ‘Jangly’ or ‘juddery’ feeling inside body
  • Struggle to cope with noise
  • Low mood
  • Tearful
  • Reaction to caffeine
  • Poor tolerance to alcohol

Coping Mechanisms – Are you using any of these to improve how you feel?

    • Caffeine
    • Energy Drinks Red Bull Lucozade/Sports Drinks
    • Alcohol
    • Anti-depressants
    • Sleeping tablets
    • Comfort eating with sugary or high fat foods
    • Screening calls to avoid having to speak to people
    • Withdrawing from social events
    • Putting on an act or brave face
    • Dishonesty about how tired or unwell you feel
    • Started a gym routine to build stamina to combat exhaustion
    • Blame external circumstances and believe you will feel better when they change
    • Take time off from work just to go to bed
    • Going to bed really early every night just to be able to get up and work
    • Expect energy levels to change on their own
    • Anti-depressants
    • Sleeping tablets
    • Loads of supplements in an ad hoc way

If you have ticked lots of boxes, it’s okay. Awareness is the Key to regaining our balance and health. You have taken your first step toward wellbeing.

Next Steps……

Gaining Clarity

1. Take some time to reflect on where you are right now and where you would love to be in terms of your health and lifestyle.

2. Notice if you dismiss what you really want, in favour of what you feel you must do.

3. Journaling is helpful to access what you been unable or anxious to voice.

Take Loving Action

Prioritise your wellbeing and seek some help and support to rebalance and rebuild your life in a way that honours your wellbeing above all else. Then you will be able to be everything you want to be in the world.

Claim Your Birth Right

Wellbeing is about feeling grounded, vibrant, and excited about your life. It’s only when we shine a light on behaviours, we may have slipped into, that we gain the perspective to take responsibility for creating our health and a life we truly love.

About Elaine Wilkins

The Yoga Retreat Reveller and Quad biking Glam-mother!

After losing her health to Chronic fatigue in 2000 Elaine had been written off as long term chronic patient because at no point did physicians look at underlying causes of her health crash. It took a 6-year journey to recovery. Her mission was set to change this.

Elaine Wilkins is the multi-award winning Founder and author of The Chrysalis Effect, first ever accredited training in ME, CFS and Fibro Prevention and Recovery, building an international network of experts on fatigue recovery. She is also a round table mentor for One of many. The Chrysalis Effect Online Recovery Programme for fatigue and fibromyalgia recovery is currently helping over 2600 people in 24 countries with their recovery. She is delighted that the first NHS GP Pilot begins in June. Find out more at www.thechrysaliseffect.co.uk