One of Many

Woman looking to create change

post

(Guest Post) Why is sales so difficult when you care?

By

Catherine Watkin
Follow me

Catherine Watkin

Mentor, minimalist, lover of life

Catherine Watkin works with heart-centred business owners like you, who want a great business but don’t want to compromise their integrity.
She helps you get more clients saying "Yes Please!" in a way that feels authentic, comfortable and is always in alignment with your values.
Catherine believes in sales and marketing that comes from service not selfishness, from caring not coercion, and from love instead of lack.
Catherine Watkin
Follow me

Latest posts by Catherine Watkin (see all)

Whether you’re in business selling a service or product, are raising money for a cause close to your heart, or just want to sell a vision of a new way of relating to your partner, there’s going to be times when the ability to guide and influence others is an important tool in your toolkit.   But if you are like most of the clients I work with then it may be that you struggle with this whole idea of “sales”, and in particular the idea of needing to “manipulate” other people to your way of thinking.

And there’s a good reason for that. If you’re a member of the One of many™ Community then chances are the reason you are “selling” is because you feel called to make a difference to others, or to the wider world, through the work that you do or the impact you want to make.

In other words: You care

Yet the very fact of having this caring nature can itself be a block to you getting that message out confidently enough to make the difference you know you’re here to make.

For the rest of this article I’m going to refer to small business owners and their clients because this is the group of people I know best, and who I spend my life serving.   But it can apply to anything you’re selling – whether that’s a product, a service, a business opportunity, an idea or a vision.

And the question I’m asking today is:

So why is sales so darned difficult when you care?

Because after all, when we really care about our clients and want the best for them then of course we do want them to make that decision to work with us because if they don’t we can’t help them make the change they so badly want – and we don’t get to make our difference in the world.

But the very fact that we do care so much makes sales so much more difficult than it could be.

After all, it’s not just about learning a structure.

If it was as easy as the “how to” I wouldn’t even have a business!   My clients would have all gone and got themselves some good, old-fashioned style sales training a long time ago and be off merrily “closing sales”, “handling objections” and filling up their diaries – long before they even come across me.

Instead it’s about all the other “stuff”

  • A deep-seated suspicion that sales is inherently manipulative, and that’s the last thing you want to do to people you care about.
  • Feeling drawn to want to help people anyway – not just because you’ve taken their money off them.
  • Feeling conflicted about whether it’s even OK to charge money for helping people – doesn’t that make you a “bad” person?
  • Fear of coming across as pushy because you only want what’s best for people and you’d be mortified if anyone thought you were just out for your own gain.
  • Not valuing your work enough to charge what you are worth or have confident conversations to invite people to work with you – because if you don’t believe in it yourself it’s hard to sell it with integrity and integrity is important to you.

And I could go on ….

But allowing all this stuff to get in the way means that you are not making a difference to as many people as you could.   This isn’t good for your business, and it’s definitely not good for your clients.

So here’s what you can do to make the process of sales feel more authentic and in alignment with your caring intentions.

  1. Shift your focus on to the client
    To help you come at sales from a place of caring one of the most valuable things you can do is get absolutely crystal clear about your “ideal client”. Understand his or her pain, problems, desires, fears and emotions in as much detail as you can.   When you do this you can’t help form an emotional connection to them.   This means you come to your sales conversations with a fierce desire to help the client, and a focus on what’s best for them (rather than what’s in it for you).   When this happens something shifts and the sales process starts to feel like another way that you serve the client, rather than the uncomfortable bit you’ve somehow got to get through before the real work can begin.
  2. Connect with the value
    Feeling under pressure to sell is particularly difficult if deep down you are not convinced of the value of the thing you are offering. Your inner voices might whisper “Is it really worth this much?”, “What if I can’t guarantee a result?”, “Am I really good enough to be doing this?” The truth is that if you don’t 100% believe in what you’re offering then you can’t sell it with conviction or integrity.  So it’s important to do the work to connect to your value. This might be keeping a special journal where you record your success stories. Maybe even working for free with a couple of people to prove to yourself that you really are great at this (and there’s nothing wrong with this – it’s how I got started).
  3. Communicate that value
    It’s possible to be absolutely convinced about the amazing transformation you can help your clients to achieve and know that this work is worth every penny of your fees.   Yet somehow fail to communicate that to your potential client. When you struggle to articulate this difference then it’s too easy to fall back on trying to cajole, convince and push people to see what you are seeing. And this feels uncomfortable for everyone. It’s really worth taking some time out to work on communicating the value of what you offer in a way that your client will hear loud and clear and really “get it”. When that happens there’s no need to manipulate – instead you’ll hear an excited “yes please!”
  4. Follow a structure.
    Without a clear structure it’s very hard to take the potential client on a conversational journey that ends with a clear decision to say yes to working with you.   Anything else tends to turn into a meandering conversation without a clear focus – great for hanging out with friends, not so great when you care about making a difference to others.   A structure is what gives you the confidence to be authentic, and to blend in your intuition and compassion. After all it’s not enough that you care about the client – they have to feel that you care.   If you want to get started having authentic sales conversations you can take my free short video training “The 7 Steps to Yes!” here.

Finally, here are some ideas to get you started having sales conversations that feel more authentic and comfortable – even when you care:

  • Schedule some research calls with people who fit your client profile and interview them to help you better understand the problems and challenges that they are facing
  • Buy a beautiful notebook and start using it to capture all the evidence that you really are brilliant at what you do – testimonials, success stories, passing comments
  • Write a list of the 10 ways that someone’s life could change for the better as a result of working with you
  • Reach out to follow up with a potential client to give them a gentle nudge to go ahead and work with you – because you care
  • Learn a structure so that you can start to feel a greater sense control around your sales conversations.   You can get started with my free video training “The 7 Steps to Yes!” .

Catherine Watkin works with heart-centred business owners like you, who want a great business but don’t want to compromise their integrity. She helps you get more clients saying “Yes Please!” in a way that feels authentic, comfortable and is always in alignment with your values. Catherine believes in sales and marketing that comes from service not selfishness, from caring not coercion, and from love instead of lack.

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

We believe real leadership is less about skill, and more about having a well of physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual strength to draw on. Every week we support thousands of grassroots leaders globally with our free articles, videos and online trainings with powerful tools and methodologies created BY women FOR women.

Become One of many™ women creating strong, meaningful connections in our community.

post

8 strategies to overcome Imposter Sydrome

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

If you ever have that feeling that sooner or later someone is going to find out that you’re actually no good at whatever it is you’re doing, that you’re a total fraud…. or indeed you’ve not taken opportunities IN CASE someone finds out you’re a fraud… then chances are you’re suffering from Imposter Syndrome. In this blog we take a look at why we feel it (or avoid it), and what to do about it.

Imposter Syndrome was first described by Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes as ‘Occuring among high achievers who are unable to internalise and accept their success. These high achievers will often contribute their success to luck rather than accomplishment and fear that others are going to unmask them.’

It is very common in high achievers, and more common in women than in men.

Jodie Foster, feared she’d have to give her Oscar back after winning it for ‘The Accused’. “I thought it was a fluke,” she said in an interview. Another extraordinary actress Kate Winslet, said “fame doesn’t give you confidence.” And Maya Angelou, an incredible woman who was a fount of wisdom, knowledge and extraordinary insight, suffered with it as well. Even though she wrote 11 books, she still feared she would be ‘found out.’

If you ever feel like you’re a bit of a fraud, if you ever achieve great success but try and write it off as luck or being in the right place at the right time, you’re in really great company.

Imposter Syndrome is a horrible feeling. A strong sense that you’re a fake, or an imposter. That one day you’re going to be found out.

This feeling stops us stepping into our greatness. Every time I up-level I get this feeling. It’s so powerfully uncomfortable that sometimes we avoid taking the steps or embracing the opportunities that may come our way in an attempt to avoid it.

It has us play small. It has us not be bold for fear of being found out.

It affects many of us – small business owners, big business owners, celebrities and also successful corporate employees. As entrepreneurs it stops you owning your talents and promoting yourself. As a corporate it stops you putting yourself forward for promotion because you don’t even feel like you should even be where you are.

I truly believe that your hearts’ desire and the will of source are one and the same.

The etymology of desire is de sidere which means of the stars.

If you long for something, wish for something or even just hope for something. It’s because it’s destined. It’s supposed to be. I call them your marching orders.

Many of us don’t go after our desires because we feel like we’re not big enough or bold enough for it. We feel like an imposter. The fear of being found out, and the shame that would result in stops us.

Brené Brown has made an amazing contribution in the psychological field in relation to shame and guilt. She suggests that vulnerability is the key to getting past these limiting feelings and that we have to go through shame, through the vulnerability to get to whole- hearted, to get to the feeling of joy and living on purpose.

This is reflected in the common call for women who are further along in their careers to share their vulnerabilities, in order to help those below them to be bold enough to step up. It’s common to look at those ahead of us and think they have everything sorted, or that is was easy for them, which is usually not the case at all.

Personally, I go through cycles. I’ve been up-levelling lately and it always raises the familiar old feelings of discomfort. Increasingly I become bolder as I am prepared to be vulnerable and step into the discomfort that arises as I embrace what I am inspired to do in the world.

Recently two of the women in my mastermind were on Necker Island with George and Amal Clooney, some other extraordinary people, and of course Richard Branson.

I got an invite for that trip and I didn’t go. The topic was interesting but wasn’t particularly my bag, they were discussing politics and criminal justice. But was that the only reason I didn’t go? It did make me have a look at my imposter syndrome. I found underlying was a fear of going and being the dumbest and least successful person in the room.

My fellow master-minders shared that they went exactly for this, knowing they would be the dumbest and poorest people in the room, but in doing so they would be able to be the greatest students.

How can you overcome Imposter Syndrome?

  1. Reach out to someone.

Find sources of support that you can turn to in those moments of fear. The people who will champion you, encourage you and remind you how great you are. I feel truly blessed to be surrounded by the most amazing supportive people in my life. We all need support and encouragement.

  1. Remind yourself what you have achieved.

Read over your bio. I often do this when I have Imposter Syndrome moments. It’s really great to remind yourself of all the things you have done and achieved in your life. Don’t forget the small things either.

  1. Create an ‘I rock’ file

Create an ‘I rock’ file by collecting clippings, thank you cards, notes, messages on facebook or emails of congratulations or thanks. Have a look through your I rock file when you need reminding of the positive difference you’ve made to other people and the things you’ve achieved.

  1. Own your success

Accept that you have had some role in your success. Yes you may have had an opportunity that others didn’t have but there are plenty of people born with a silver spoon who mess it up. Life’s not fair but you did do something to get where you are.

  1. Shift from ‘me’ focus to ‘other’ focus

There’s nothing like shifting your focus from yourself to others to overcome Imposter Syndrome and discover the impetus to go for it.

I’m passionate about The hunger project (an organisation committed to the sustainable end of world hunger). When Imposter Syndrome rears its head I think of all the women, their families and communities that we have helped so far.

  1. Stop comparing yourself to little miss perfect

Drop the idea of how you think you should be and stop looking at other women from the outside. I was really surprised to discover my coach Ali Brown also has Imposter Syndrome, she’s achieved some remarkable things and is an extraordinary woman. Yet every single human being is vulnerable is some way, it’s good to remember that.

  1. Be unafraid to feel it

Get out there and be vulnerable. Claim it, be bold, get out there and do the thing that makes you feel vulnerable. Remember Brené Brown’s research that in order to get past shame you need to feel it.

  1. Name it

When you next feel like a fraud remind yourself that it is just a feeling. You are not a not a fraud, you are just feeling like a fraud. Phone one of your support buddies and say “I’m having a moment of Imposter Syndrome.”

 

I hope you find those strategies helpful. Take a moment right now to consider what opportunities are you not stepping into because of the fear of being found out?

I’ve got 2 challenges for you this week, firstly I invite you to find the support that helps you to move forward when Imposter Syndrome sneaks up on you.

Second ask yourself what could I be doing if imposter syndrome wasn’t holding me back?

Remember Jodie Foster and Kate Winslet feel it too and it doesn’t stop them, so don’t let it stop you.

I look forward to hearing about your breakthroughs. Share them in the comments here or in our BeOne community.

post

Why I don’t believe in Procrastination

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

If you’ve ever found yourself putting off an important task then this blog is going to be useful for you. We’ll be exploring what causes us to procrastinate and what to do about it.

In my experience of coaching highly successful women I’ve discovered that a lot of women tell themselves they’re procrastinating when actually it’s something else. So let’s start with a definition.

My definition of procrastination is putting off an important task.

It’s not putting off an unimportant task, that’s prioritisation.

It’s also not putting off an important task when you’re tired. By my definition that’s energy management.

For example, recently I needed to film 3 new episodes of Jo & Co (my online TV show), I’d been to the hairdresser, I was all ready to go back to the studio but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. It would have been easy to think ‘I’m procrastinating,’ but when I took stock of all I’d been doing I just knew I wasn’t in the right energetic state to make great TV episodes. So I rescheduled, took a walk in the woods instead and replenished myself with some nourishing food, relaxing videos and an early night.

This brings me to a reminder of our One of many™ #1 Soft Power Principle which is first replenish your energy. I really can’t say this enough, your energy is the most important thing. So instead of engaging super woman to push through your to-do list when you need some time out, take it, you’ll be so much more effective and happier because of it.

From its Latin roots, procrastination literally means putting off until tomorrow.

But I don’t think procrastination serves us at all. So often the inner critic is having a field day, and to tell yourself you are procrastinating makes you feel bad about yourself.

Let’s face it, sometimes we need to defer important tasks. So instead of giving yourself a hard time I invite you to look at why you’re doing it because this always opens up a solution. Ask yourself ‘why am I deferring this important task?’

If it’s not that you need to replenish your energy (always start there) perhaps it’s one of these other 6 reasons…

  1. Lack of momentum.

One of the common reasons people don’t get things done is simply a lack of momentum. I’ve noticed this with a lot of my clients. If you’re starting a new business or are taking a shift in your business, the first thing you need to do is to get into momentum.

Start by prioritising what’s important and break it into smaller chunks so you can make a start. This begins to create momentum.

We teach this energy allocation process in our programs (especially BeFruitful) and at our retreats. It’s so powerful and exciting to witness the momentum build and burst forth into fruitful action.

  1. Out of Flow.

Perhaps it’s an out of flow activity for you. By this I mean it’s not aligned with your natural strengths and talents.

The simplest solution is to give it to someone else who can help you with the task. But that’s not always possible is it. When I was a solopreneur I needed to do a lot of out of flow tasks. For me, it’s the detailed tasks like the figures that I find most challenging.

The way I found to do it was the batching for energy matching process. Quite simply this means tasks of similar energy should be batched together. Then you reward yourself at the end.

I used to do my figures every Friday afternoon and then reward myself by having drinks with my friends.

As a business owner it’s important to know your figures, so I still have to do this task. What I do now is use the Women’s Archetypes to embody the most efficient and effective energy for the task at hand.

You can find out more about the Archetypes in our program Embrace: Your Soft Power (email talk@oneofmany.co.uk if you want more info).

  1. It’s Unpleasant.

Maybe you need to let go of a staff member, have a strong conversation with a client, or a difficult conversation with your spouse or teenage daughter. None of us can completely avoid the fact that on occasion these challenging and uncomfortable tasks arise.

The best way to deal with this is to do it first thing the very next day. Or in other words ‘Eat that Frog’, the well-known phrase from Brian Tracy’s best-selling book.

Don’t forget to reward yourself when you’ve done it.

In our BeOne community we have a buddy system, so women can create accountability partners for such life challenges.

  1. Overwhelm

Another commonality I see in high performing women is putting off things that take longer to do. Those tasks that require consistent effort get delayed.

Remember Soft Power Principle #1? Check your energy levels first. If you are low on energy then click this link to discover the overwhelm first aid approach with 10 simple steps to calm.

If your energy is ok, then take some time to break the task down into chunks to get that momentum going and schedule some time in your diary.

  1. Perfectionism

Sometimes you might put off completing or starting something because you fear it won’t be good enough. This is procrastination with an emotional reason.

First recognise that’s what you are doing. One technique we use is to future pace the imperfection. Annie Stoker, our head coach, is brilliant at this. Basically you think of the worst case scenario of the completion of the task and then keep thinking it through to fruition. Just what is it that you are really afraid of? It’s really important to bring some humour and give it some detailed thought. Remember, nothing is ever really the end of the world!

  1. Decision Phobia.

Are you in analysis paralysis? Wrestling around in the mental inability to make a choice, stuck on the indecision roundabout.

To overcome this try harnessing your Queen energy and just make a decision…any decision! There is no such thing as right or wrong. Just make a decision and begin moving, get the feedback, make another decision, get the feedback and so on.

In conclusion

To sum up when you feel a bit stuck ask yourself…

  1. Is this task important or unimportant?
  2. Do I have the energy to do it right now?
  3. If yes, why am I putting this off? Check through the 6 reasons above.

Very occasionally there is another factor at play. What you thought was important isn’t important to you!

In my experience of life (except when I need to replenish my energy), if I have energy for some tasks, the only time I don’t have energy for important tasks is because they’re not really important. I find the more I live on purpose and the clearer I am about my purpose, I always have energy to do tasks that need doing.

It’s hard to procrastinate when you’re really clear on your big why.

My takeaway message is be kind to yourself.

Can you see that it’s rare you’ll be putting something off just because you don’t want to do it? It’s more often than not one of the other 6 reasons and you now know how to overcome them.

You can explore all of these solutions in more depth in our powerful online program BeFruitful.

Let me know how you’re getting on by leaving a comment below.

post

Has the world gone mad? You are the solution to these crazy times!

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

I really think the world is going mad. It feels like our future, the destiny of our children is being altered dramatically every other week right now.

I’m writing this as I fly home to the UK from a holiday in Australia with my family.  And everywhere I turn the world feels uncertain.

What with the aftermath of the Brexit vote in the UK; an incredibly uncertain election result in Australia (with some very scary candidates getting in); a head to head in the USA between potentially the first female US president and possibly the most obnoxious man on the planet… the ground is definitely shifting.

Now I’m a scientific gal at heart (being a doctor and all that); but I’ve been reading and talking to a lot of spiritual types lately who tell me that the cause of this global insanity is too much “masculine” for too long.  Too much focus on competition, individualism, achievement, profit, and power without an appropriate context.

Whether you believe that or not, it just seems to make sense to me that what the world needs now is more women making important decisions! In fact, we need more femininity in all our leaders.  More focus on collaboration, connection, growth for the good of all.

But the problem is we women don’t trust our own femininity.

We see it as weak.  A place where nothing gets done.  Frilly and silly and soppy.  I understand.  I did for most of my life.  That was until I realized they call it “Mother Nature” for a reason.  And she’s the most powerful ‘entity’ I know.

Perhaps it’s time for us to take a leaf out of her book and OWN our power as women.  The fertile, destructive, compassionate, nurturing, collaborative power we have at our core.

Because when we can own it- we can trust it.  And when we trust it, the world will trust it.  And then we can change this crazy world we live in.

I’m an action taker. I’m watching my son play on the seat next to me while I type this and I can’t help but imagine him saying to me in 30 years – “Mum, when it looked like it was going to hell in a handbasket, what did you do?”  I truly hope I can say to him “I had a vision for this world we see now buddy- with love, and hope and balance and equality- and I asked some other amazing women to join me on the path, and we sowed the seeds for the global shift we’re now enjoying.”

I have a huge mission here with One of many.

I’m committed to unleashing the bold, grassroots leadership of 1 million women internationally because I believe that this new world paradigm of feminine leadership will arise when we reach a critical tipping point, and 1 million women all over the world should do it! I want to equip these women with the tools to get out of “Superwoman Mode” and fall in love with their Soft Power; to trust their feminine energy; and to succeed in ways they’d never imagined possible.

Perhaps, like me, you’ve been feeling something similar.  A real awareness that the future of our very existence lies in the hands of the empowerment (perhaps re-powerment) of women.

Perhaps, like me, you find yourself working closely with women in your work and as a manager, coach, consultant or trainer and you want to be a part of the solution in these uncertain times.

That’s why I am running a free webinar next week called

 “Catalysing the Evolution of Women:
How to Unleash the Power of Your Team, Your Clients and Yourself.”

on Wednesday 20th July at 8pm London time
(That’s 3pm New York, 5am AEST on Thurs)

If you work with women, or want to work with women, join me to discover:

  • The #1 missing link in most  personal development methodologies which often leads to changes “not sticking” for women (after all most effectiveness, leadership and personal growth methodologies were created by men, for a male paradigm).
  • The Superwoman myth, and how bigger, better, faster, more is causing an epidemic of dissatisfaction from women globally.
  • The 3 common disempowering archetypes that prevent women from being effective, and how to avoid them.
  • The 5 Women’s PowerTypes(TM) and how they can be used in your coaching, consulting and management to bring the best out in the women you work with (and yourself)
  • How you can become a One of ManyCertified Women’s Coach and use our tools, techniques, templates and brand new profiling tools to help women more effectively and joyfully than ever before.

I’d love to work with you to empower a million women to step into their leadership so we can make this world a sustainable and loving place.

If you know your work is part of the solution, join me and see if we have synergy!

Click here to join me for “Catalysing the Evolution of Women“

post

How to stop overwhelm in its tracks

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

Stress, time poverty, and overwhelm has become incredibly common among women — in fact, it’s almost become a badge of honour!

And it’s no wonder. In a society where we’re largely expected to function linearly, exactly like men (although our biology is totally different), not to mention the association of busyness with personal value and the constant barrage of “Do more, be more, have more,” overwhelm isn’t a possibility … it’s pretty much a guarantee.

It doesn’t have to be this way, of course — that’s one of the biggest things we teach at One of Many, a different way of being that plays up your natural advantages as a woman. But this is a process, and sometimes you need something to deal with the overwhelm right now!

Enter my process for stopping overwhelm in its tracks:

Step one: STOP

Seriously, just stop whatever you’re doing. When you’re in a state of overwhelm, there’s no point in trying to push yourself forwards; you’ll most likely end up doing more harm than good. So as soon as you notice that you’re overwhelmed — maybe you’ll start crying, or get angry or anxious, maybe your back goes out — just stop.

Step two: nurture

I’ve got this theory that the frontal lobe of the brain (the bit that makes the decisions) can only make a certain number of decisions in any one period of time. Any more than that, and you hit a wall and go into overwhelm.

When you hit this point, think of it like there’s a little hurting child inside of you who’s exhausted. She stayed up too late playing with her friends, and she’s wasted. She had too much sugar, and she missed her afternoon nap, and stayed up late watching the fireworks or whatever it was, and now, she’s overwhelmed.

What do you naturally do for this little girl? You don’t berate her for being unproductive or shout at her for crying, you comfort her! So as soon as you stop whatever it is you were doing, go into your Mother archetype and give some lovely, nurturing energy to that little girl. This is absolutely vital, so don’t skip this step!

Step three: prioritise

After you’ve been in your Mother archetype and grounded down a bit more into your breath and your body, you can take a look at all the things you have to do. Now, there’s a longer process that you can go through with this that I teach step by step in BeFruitful, but the highlights are to list out absolutely everything that you have to do, then prioritise all that stuff — and for many of the things on the list, the priority is going to be “extremely low” to “never”. Your whole focus now is on getting extremely focused on only those things you must do right now.

Once you’ve narrowed your list down by chucking things that don’t really need to be done and deciding to delegate anything you possibly can, then you prioritise everything that’s left according to ABC:

Absolutely must be done today

Bloody nice if it gets done today

Could do it today

Step four: replenish

Next, leave your list alone and go do something else. I know, it goes against the grain if you’re used to pushing through, but you have got to replenish yourself a bit before you can even think of starting to work again. So go have a cup of tea, take a bath, take a walk … do something for at least 20 minutes that’s going to nurture you a bit. Again, this is really important, so don’t skip this step!

Step five: start eating the elephant

Finally, once you’ve replenished, you can have another look at your list. If there aren’t any “As” on it, then the best thing you can do is to call it for the day. Just give yourself the afternoon off, answer the very clear call from your body to stop and rest for a while.

If you do have some “A”s, then start on just one tiny thing off that list. Remember the old saying about eating an elephant? You can’t eat an elephant in one mouthful, but you can if you do it one bite at a time. So do it like that — just take one bite, and then do a little replenish, and then take another bite.

Why not practice now? List out one way that you can replenish yourself in the comments below … and then do it, whether you’re feeling overwhelmed or not!

post

My Rituals for Reentry: How to Hit the Ground Running After a Break

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

I think there are few things as frustrating as coming back from a holiday ready to take on the world the morning of your first day back … and feeling like you’ve fallen flat on your face by the afternoon.

This used to happen to me all the time (and from what you ladies have told me, I’m definitely not the only one), so this week I wanted to dig into some really practical strategies you can use to hit the ground running on your first day back from a break. Over the years I’ve developed sort of a system for reentry that’s served me really well, so see what elements of it might serve you:

Streamline while on holiday

The last thing you want to do when you’re on holiday is more work, and that’s absolutely as it should be; you need time to rest and replenish yourself! But one thing that I’ve found very helpful is to take some time, like when you’re driving from one place to the next or waiting on a flight — you know, those times when you really just need to kill time — and I go through my inbox.

Don’t get me wrong — this is NOT about engaging with those emails or working. It’s about streamlining my experience when I get back to work. Because I know that I’m probably going to get a couple of hundred emails while I’m away, but I’ll really only need to respond to about 20 or so of those.

So when I’ve got a few minutes to kill, I just go through my inbox and delete every single promotional email, and every email that just isn’t going to need a response. This means that when I come back I’m not bombarded by a full inbox; I’ve just got those couple of crucial emails from my team or my partners, plus whatever emails have trickled in in the few days since I’ve checked it.

The first day back is sacred

By which I mean, I don’t plan anything that’s going to involve other people at all on day one of reentry. No interviews, no appointments, no nothing. If you absolutely must plan something for the first day, make sure it’s at two or three in the afternoon at the very earliest. This gives you the space to really sit with your ideas and any new awareness you encountered during your holiday, and it takes the pressure off — you don’t come right back to a million people demanding your attention.

Now, I know that this isn’t going to be possible for everyone. I’m really fortunate to work from a studio in my garden, but if you work in an office you might find this a bit harder. In that case, I’d say to try sneaking into the office on the Sunday before, or a day when it’s going to be quiet, or even working from home, just for the morning. If you give yourself the gift of a few hours, you’ll be able to set yourself up to be fruitful for months.

So what do I actually do on the first day back?

I use that sacred first day to go through a process of brainstorming and prioritisation. So the first thing I go is to go into my office and use a ritual to get into my Queen energy. Then I grab a pen and paper and capture all of my holiday ideas — this is just purely about getting the ideas on paper, it’s not about prioritising or planning yet.

Once I’ve done that, I shift into a more formal brainstorming period where I look at my project list and jot down any particular tasks related to those projects that I want to make sure are happening.

Once I’ve got everything out of my head, I go into my inbox and immediately work it down to zero. Anything I can answer within a minute, I do instantly, and anything that takes longer than that gets turned into a task in my task management system. And while I’m at it, I take everything that’s in my notebook and incorporate it into my task management system as well.

Then I go through and schedule and prioritise everything. Doing this sets me up for some really fruitful meetings with my team the next day, because I’ve had time to think, organise, and prioritise all my thoughts and priorities for my business and life, so I’m able to communicate them really effectively.

Finally — and this is the tricky bit — I stop on time. It’s so tempting to overdo it as soon as you get back, but doing that will just kill all that fabulous replenished energy and tank your momentum, so make sure you don’t go into full yang energy mode and burn yourself out before you even get started.

Now I’d like to know … how do you get back into the swing of things after a break? Tell me below in the comments!

post

Selling from the Heart — It’s Not Just for Business

By

Catherine Watkin
Follow me

Catherine Watkin

Mentor, minimalist, lover of life

Catherine Watkin works with heart-centred business owners like you, who want a great business but don’t want to compromise their integrity.
She helps you get more clients saying "Yes Please!" in a way that feels authentic, comfortable and is always in alignment with your values.
Catherine believes in sales and marketing that comes from service not selfishness, from caring not coercion, and from love instead of lack.
Catherine Watkin
Follow me

Latest posts by Catherine Watkin (see all)

When I teach heart-centred business owners how to sell in a way that feels authentic and comfortable, they are often amazed at how smooth and easy the whole process becomes. Yes, even those conversations that used to feel so awkward and clunky become something you to look forward to!

But what my clients also find is that learning to sell from the heart doesn’t only improve their business — it improves their whole life.

After all, another good word for sales (and maybe one that doesn’t conjure up such icky pictures of sleazy salesmen in cheap suits) is “enrolment”.

Just think about it, how often in your daily life do you find yourself wanting to enrol someone else in your vision?

Sure, it may be enrolling your potential client in the vision of how different their life could be after working with you.

But it might be enrolling a spouse or partner into a shared vision of a future that you can work towards together. Or enrolling your boss in the idea of allowing you to switch to part-time working hours so you can pursue an interest your heart is calling you to.

The thing is, very often, getting what we want in life does require the involvement of other people.

For so many women the first hurdle is to learn to ask for what we need in the first place.  But then when we do that it can so easily backfire  because it’s too easy to come across as though you are just in it for the money.

You see, nobody likes getting pushed into doing something they don’t want to just because it suits your agenda – whether that’s buying your product, or taking the kids to the cinema for the afternoon so you can have some pampering time. When we put the focus only on what we want – on what is best for us without regard for the other person – we end up cajoling and browbeating and pushing the other person away, and then nobody gets what they want.

But if you can learn to implement some of these key principles from heart-centred sales you will find that those interactions go so much more smoothly:

1. Connection

Before you enter the conversation, connect deeply with the reason you are asking and with the person you are asking. The truth is that you can never “make” someone do something to suit your agenda.  But if you can truly connect with them you will start to see the world through their eyes – and when you do you can often find a common way, a way where both of you gain, even where  before it looked like you were on opposite sides of a chasm.

2. Value

The magic question to use here is “What’s in it for me?” – not for you personally, but for the other person. What is the value to the other person of saying yes to you? To do this, you need to be able to put what’s best for them high on the agenda. The more you understand what your client (or your husband or boss) really wants, the easier it is for you to show how they can get that by saying yes to you, and then you both get what you want.

3. Lower Resistance

In any interaction where the other person suspects that you might just be out for yourself, they often have their energetic defences right up.  I always imagine those plastic riot shields that the police use. Nobody is going to agree to something if they are using all of their energy to defend themselves against you. So rather than be tempted to browbeat, work on lowering this resistance.

One very powerful way to do this is to tell them straight up that you are not going to be forcing them to make a decision, and it will be OK with you if they say no – but you would like them to seriously consider what you have to say.

Another is to make sure you have their permission and full attention.   Don’t just walk up to someone and launch in to your agenda with any warning, instead ask them:

“It sounds to me like my work could really help you, is it OK with you if I tell you a little more about my programmes?”

4.  Follow a Structure

A good structure is pure gold in a sales conversation — it gives the conversation focus and makes sure it actually has a clear outcome. Similarly, if you want to have an important conversation with your partner about you giving up work to go back to college, don’t just leap in and blurt stuff out – it’s not likely to go well. Instead, plan it in advance.   Know how you will guide the conversation to make sure that you cover all the right things in the right order so that you can demonstrate the value, lower resistance, and guide the conversation to a decision that works for both of you.

When you apply some of these principles you’ll be amazed at how much smoother and easier those conversations feel for everyone involved. My invitation to you? Try at least one of these principles out in the coming week, and let me know how it goes in the comments!

Want to learn more?

Would you like to learn more about how to have heart-centred sales conversations without being pushy or manipulative?   Then join me for this online training on Wednesday 23rd September at 7.00pm!

Click here to join us for the webinar

post

The 4 reasons your to-do list is getting longer not shorter

By Leave a Comment

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

There are days when you wake at 4am. You don’t know what woke you up, but you are cursing it.

Now you’re brain has started ticking over.

You finally give up on trying to get back to sleep, and get up at 5:30. You are already feeling overwhelmed at everything that is on your plate for the day. So you just launch into it…to relieve some of the pressure your feeling.

4 reasons your to do list is getting longer“bzzzzzzz” … wrong move.

Can you believe it? By 5:32am you’ve already gone wrong!

It’s actually pretty common. So let me tell you why MOST women, when they are MOST under the pump, manage to make their ‘to-do’ list longer rather than shorter.

 

As women, we are pulled in many directions, and not always towards something fruitful!

 

Our brains play a daily game of Twister. We turn ourselves inside out trying to maneuver all the family demands, life administration, and work demands into one epic gymnastics move. But no one is there applauding us for it at the end of the day!

It’s just another day in the life of you (and me!)

So your to-do list is large. Two things we can do about that…

1/ you get better at saying no (and we will get to that another time).

2/ we manage what’s on there more effectively and realistically.

That’s easier said than done when we are using old school time management techniques to manage our list. Typically this is yet another area we see ourselves as women, working through a masculine set-up to achieve an outcome. The truth is, simply prioritizing a list of tasks and working through them, like a man would, is just not suitable for a woman. If we are tackling this list in a manner that is going to sustain, even increase, our energy, we need a different approach.

I wanted to give you a little insight into some of my tools for ways to cope with what’s on your plate from the perspective of energy management, not task management.

I guess at this point, it is helpful to say, it is probably worth taking at least a week long view on your to do list. Much like a budget, it does help if you have a little reserve time up your sleeve to get ahead of yourself. That way you can make the most of the energy ups and downs that inevitably occur in a week.

Having said that if you are standing there right now staring down the barrel of an extensive “to-do” list today, then all of what I am about to teach you still applies for today. So, grab a cuppa, and your to-do list and lets get started!

 Here are my top 4 reasons you are going wrong with your To-Do list management:

  1. You brain dump and you prioritize your list by numbering only.
  2. When you get interrupted you spend 10 mins going back over the list re-prioritising again, and working out where you were up to and wasting energy.
  3. You give too much attention to the squeakiest wheel on the list (which isn’t always the most important!)
  4. You don’t have a clear delineation method to where an email response turns into a new task in its own right.

IMG_6425Don’t prioritise by number only, get some Alpha action in there!

So you’ve brain-dumped the list. Instead of starting with numbers, start with letters. Mine go like this:

A= Absolutely has to be done today

B = Bloody nice if it did get done

C= Let’s See if does or it doesn’t.

 Then let’s get our numbers on!

Number the A’s from 1-100 (or how ever many there are)

And do the same with your Bs and your Cs.

So when the baby cries, the staff member has a meltdown, or someone else’s priorities get in the way of yours for a minute, you can easily go back to where the list was left. I guess it’s like remembering where you parked the car in the multi-level parking lot. You never forget it, A5, or C1, or B4. And at the end of the day, you can applaud yourself (we already know no one else will!) Because unless you’re being completely unrealistic with yourself, chances are, you got through at least the A list. And that was what HAD to be done right!?

 Quieting the squeaky wheels

A task list prioritised the way I am talking about here, allows you to get serious clarity, within 10 minutes at the start of a day.

So when you find yourself spending more than 5 minutes on an email response. Or when you find yourself on the phone answering your husband’s long-winded business questions. Or when you realize that going through the life insurance application form is going to take 5 hours not 5 minutes.

BANG.

You look at you’re highly categorised priority list, and say to yourself…”where does this fit on here”. If it’s in the A group, keep doing it. But if it’s on the C list and you haven’t even started the A list…It’s worth telling that “squeaky wheel” you need to put them on the priority list. If you don’t, I can already tell that you will be awake again at 5:30am tomorrow in a silent panic.

I don’t want to see you back here early tomorrow morning! Get prioritising ladies!

Next week I am going to take a week long view and talk about energy allocation, rather than prioritisation. If you love what i am saying here, you can learn more about it by getting our 7 Rituals to Calm the Daily Chaos, head to the home page and sign up.

Let me know what you think in the comments below. We love to hear ideas from our community.

 

 

 

post

The Secret Soft Power of Being Lazy

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

We know all kinds of people here at One of many. We know female entrepreneurs and business owners, we know stay-at-home mothers and full-time workers. We also attract a lot of creative types, writers and artists of all sorts.

I thought I’d mention this because I was speaking with one of our writers the other day and she was telling me how she transformed her rate of productivity. She did it by giving herself a break, a real break, every now and again.

We are so busy these days that if we stop we worry that all the plates will stop spinning. We are pulled in so many different directions that when we do have time to ourselves we get anxious about not wasting time.

What do I mean by a real break? I’ll tell you what I don’t mean! Checking Facebook while you wait for the kettle to boil is not a real break. Eating your lunch is not a real break. Zoning out in front of the television for a couple of hours at the end of the day is not a real break either.

If you don’t stop every once in a while, really stop, eventually you will burn out. This writer told me that some time back she felt as if her well of inspiration had dried out. She kept trying and trying, getting more panicked, coming up with nothing. Then she realised that she had to stop for a while, really stop, to let the well of inspiration fill up again. And that’s exactly what she did.

The truth is that rest is productive. Slowing down actually seems to speed up the visioning process.

Perhaps it’s a paradox. Maybe the more rested and centred you are, the more you feel the urge to create, to produce.

So when you don’t feel like doing anything, and you’re worried about wasting a day, ask yourself what you feel like doing, and just once in a while, honour your desire. Doze, read, eat, shower, don’t shower, stand up, sit down, stand on your head, etc. according to your preference.

Sooner or later your productive, expressive nature will kick in again. Your soft power. It might take hours, days or even weeks. But once you’re good and rested, you’ll be meaningfully productive.

Do you take regular breaks? How long does it take for you to feel truly rested. Have you ever given yourself the day off? Let us know your stories in the comments we love to hear from you.

Dr Joanna Martin: Founder, oneofmany.co.uk.| Author| Women’s Speaker| Entrepreneur| Ex-doctor| Loud Sister| Baby Wrangler = No professional training but do a fine job nonetheless!

post

The Secret Way to Inbox Zero

By

Joanna Martin

Founder: One of many. Author. Ex-doctor. Entrepreneur. Sister. Sometime Actor. Baby Wrangler. Personal Chef. Mother.

Latest posts by Joanna Martin (see all)

If you’re anything like me when you go back to work after a break – even a small one – your heart sinks as soon as you open your email. There’s nothing quite as depressing as a big-ass number of emails in your inbox. It can leave you feeling overwhelmed or stressed. We all know this is not the optimum mood for productivity!

The problem is that we never really get to the bottom of our inboxes these days. It’s just one more thing we can never quite lick into shape, like the ironing or the garden to the last few pounds of holiday weight.

Well, here’s a few ideas to start making your way towards a wonderful place called Inbox Zero.

When you are at Inbox Zero you are the most perfect version of yourself. You are in control. You are capable. You have the time to pursue the things you want most of all.

UNSUBSCRIBE – How many times have you found yourself distracted by an email offer or newsletter? Be brutal. If you cannot see an easy way to unsubscribe then block the account to send any dead wood straight to your junk. You should see a difference immediately. Those five minutes you might spend daydreaming over a bargain Caribbean cruise are yours again. Use them wisely.

FIVE MINUTE FLASH – Instead of checking Facebook or the news (or One of Many!) on your phone when you’re waiting in line or have a couple of minutes between meetings see how many emails you can get through. Respond to those that you know from the subject line will only take a few seconds. Challenge yourself to do more in five minutes next time.

SHORT AND SWEET – I heard a great story recently about a woman working in Hollywood who took a wayward actress under her wing and turned her career around. News of her dedication reached the boss of the company, a huge Hollywood mogul. He sent her a long email, congratulating her on her work, copying the email to many important people. This woman’s emailed reply? Thanks.

COPY AND PASTE – Have you got a form response to save precious minutes when no further action is required? Not only will it save you time typing the email but you expand less mental energy composing and suitable reply. Something like: “This is great, thanks for keeping me in the loop.” can cover you plenty of times.

AN INBOX IS NOT A FILING CABINET – Repeat that after me. Even the most basic email programs will have a filing system. Get to know yours. It is easy to get into the habit of e-searching through your entire inbox for the right correspondence. The same search will still pick-up an email you archived. But moving a hundred emails to an archive folder will make room for new business to flow!

How many emails in your inbox right now? Are you a hoarder or a sorter? Does a trip to inbox zero sound good to you? Let us know in the comments…or by email 🙂

Dr Joanna Martin: Founder, oneofmany.co.uk.| Author| Women’s Speaker| Entrepreneur| Ex-doctor| Loud Sister| Baby Wrangler = No professional training but do a fine job nonetheless!