One of Many

Woman looking to create change

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Guest blog: Why are resolutions so hard to keep?

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As I write this, it’s January. A new year. And a time when many of us are promising ourselves that this year will be different. This year, we will stick to the diet / never smoke again / learn to play the guitar / travel more / be kinder…

Our good intentions are endless and, to paraphrase Mark Twain, the odds are that we will spend the rest of the year paving the road to Hell with them.

A few weeks in, how are you getting on? Is your enthusiasm waning? Are you making little deals with yourself?

I’ll start again on Monday…
I didn’t mean I wouldn’t drink at all, just Monday to Thursday…
One cigarette won’t hurt and then I’m really going to quit…

Let’s be honest, have you ever made a resolution and stuck to it right through to the end of the year?

Why are resolutions so hard to keep?

Maybe the clue is in the word. We define resolute as

“To be admiringly purposeful and determined, unwavering, adamant”

Who can keep that up? It sounds exhausting and just the sort of stage that Superwoman likes to strut about on. Woe betide anyone who can’t keep up… anyone who is less than “admirable”!

It seems to me that we are setting ourselves up to fail. We’ve adopted an approach that may fit with our cultural paradigm of drive, competition and dogged determination but is at odds with how we feel when we’re anticipating change.

Change can be decidedly anxiety-inducing. We often feel uncertain, nervous or ill at ease when we’re planning changes to our habits and our lives because it doesn’t matter whether the change is for the better, we’re used to what we know.

Taking a step into a new way of being can feel like a leap into the unknown and it’s unlikely we will be ‘unwavering and adamant’.

So, if resolutions are so hard to keep, is there a better way?

A more effective way to make resolutions

Our resolutions are often defined by society’s or our family’s expectations and determined by what others want or have suggested. There is no surer way to set yourself up to fail than to make a commitment that fits with someone else’s vision of your life.

Step one: get in touch with your own vision.

Stand in your power and dream the next 12 months into being.

Close your eyes and imagine that you are on your way to a party on 31 December 2019. You’re excited to see friends and family and share with them all the joy of the twelve months that have just passed. And as you get ready to leave and look back over the year, what are the highlights? What are the key moments that you want to share?

Now come back to the present.

What do you need to do to bring those moments to life this year?

Step two: Choose joy

Our resolutions are often focussed on things that we ‘should or shouldn’t’ do. These are words I have banned from my vocabulary. You won’t find joy in going through the motions out of a sense of obligation or duty – there is enough of that in life already.

Instead, I suggest you make resolutions that will ‘spark joy’ and act as a wonderful counter-balance to some of life’s inevitable drudgery.

It might be something you’ve always wanted to do but never tried; a place you’ve always wanted to visit; a new skill you’ve always wanted to master.

Here are some of the joy-filled resolutions that I, and my clients, have made over the years to inspire you.

Feel free to borrow any that spark joy in you:

  • To visit Las Vegas
  • To swim in the ocean every month
  • To learn archery
  • To visit a castle every other month
  • To start a book club with my closest friends
  • To learn Italian
  • To drive along the North Coast 500 in Scotland
  • To finally say ‘yes’ and marry my true love
  • To quit my job and retrain as a coach
  • To take a sabbatical of at least three months and rest until I’m well again
  • To have a party every season
  • To make 6 new friends
  • To stop keeping clothes for ‘best’ and wear something sparkly every day

Step three: Ask if now is the right time to make resolutions

And, of course, you could decide not to make any resolutions at all in January. Winter is a time for bedding down and returning to the earth.

Enjoy the feeling of being rooted and settled, take the time to think and to replenish yourself before Spring when the sap is rising and it may feel more natural to make changes.

When you’re ready to start thinking about change, it’s worth considering getting away from your usual haunts and habitat. Despite its modern meaning, the word resolution actually comes from a late Middle English word meaning to loosen or release.

So, release yourself from everyday triggers and learned habits. Loosen your mind to wonder and dream.

In your dreams, you already know what you want.

In your dreams, you already know what intentions to set.

In your dreams, you already know how to get to that wonderful place that you’re going to.

Perhaps it’s time to resolve less and dream more.

About Sara Price

The Knitting, Baby-whispering Karaoke queen!

Sara is a One of Many coach, a mentor and one of the first cohort of certified One of Many trainers. In addition, Sara is Founding Partner of one of London’s leading communications agencies (Pagefield) and is authoring a book entitled ‘How to Actually Change the World’.

Sara has teamed up with physiotherapist/Pilates instructor Jo Turner and nutritionist/hormone specialist Nicki Williams to create a unique women’s retreat experience in Umbria, Italy.

The ‘What’s Next’ retreat will take place from 23–29th June 2019.

For more information and for an exclusive One of Many 10% discount on this retreat, please see our webpage https://www.real-retreats.com/what-s-next-itinerary or email realretreats@gmail.com

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Guest blog: Why don’t we (actually) change the world?

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My vision is a world in which everyone who wants to change the world for the better is inspired and empowered to do so.

It’s a big vision. Making this vision a reality is like eating the proverbial elephant – I’ll be doing it one bite at a time and in collaboration with many others – including the amazing Founder of One of Many, Joanna Martin. The current ‘bite’ is to write a book – catchily entitled ‘How to (Actually) Change the World’. That’s a lot to deliver in 55,000 words but I’m going to give it my best shot!

As part of my research, I’ve spoken to hundreds of people all over the world about the kind of changes they want to create, and what gets in the way of them actually doing it. So if you’re on a mission to change the world right now and you’re feeling blocked; or if you are feeling increasingly called to make a difference, to make an impact on this beautiful planet of ours, but you’re not sure how to go about it – please read on, because you are not alone.

Here’s what I’ve found so far…

So…Who Wants to Change the World?

An awful lot of us want to change the world. . If you’re an active member of the BeOne Global Community on Facebook, you may have seen and perhaps completed my survey for actual and aspiring changemakers. Of the people who have filled in the survey thus far, EVERYONE wants to change the world in some way.

When asked if there was something they would like to change to make the world a better place, 47% said that there were so many things they didn’t know where to start! Another 24% had one big issue that they were truly passionate about. Everyone else felt passionate about 2 or 3 main subjects and couldn’t pick one.

How Do We Want to Change the World?

We want to change the world for other women. My survey may be slightly skewed because of where it was posted and the kinds of women who’ve completed it, but of all the issues that we are passionate about, the top three categories are:

  • Women’s issues
  • Environment
  • Education & training

In other words, the issues which matter most to us are: other women; the planet and the next generation.

Some of us are dedicating our working lives to these issues. About 12% of respondents have already set up / run or work for a social enterprise dealing with the specific issue that they are most passionate about. Another 12% are operating in the charitable sphere on their number one issue.

Many respondents wrote in comments that tackling their number one issue was the mission of their business. That’s a lot of women dedicating their working lives to making the world a better place!

Many of those who work in other fields are taking action in their personal time. Nearly 95% of us are talking to friends and family – trying to persuade them of the importance of our cause. 85% have taken to social media to make our point and demonstrate our passion. Over 80% have signed online petitions.

Are We Making Progress?

Most of us feel that we’re not making enough progress. Amongst the social entrepreneurs, charity leaders and those whose professional mission is to change the world, only 30% were satisfied with the progress they are making.

Most of us want to do more: Of those who are taking action in their personal time, a whopping 97% want to do more but are hampered by a perceived lack of time and a feeling of not knowing where to start. The same feeling that stops about 20% of us from taking any action at all.

And that is where I hope that my book will help.

It’s Not Complicated…

I understand that changing the world can seem overwhelming but here is what I believe: changing the world may be hard work but it is not actually that complicated.

I can already feel the waves of disagreement and disbelief heading my way but, I’m sticking to my guns here because I genuinely believe that in principle changing the world is not complicated. It requires only one thing: you have to make people care.

You have to make companies care enough to change their policies; or make politicians care enough to change legislation; or make individuals care enough to change their behaviour and / or their minds. You have to know who holds the power to make the change, and you have to make them care enough to do it.

In Fact, It’s Really Quite Simple…

To make people care, you need to harness the power of great communications. It’s about communicating your message to the right people at the right time in a way that feels compelling to them. That’s it.

Now, there are a lot of experts out there with a vested interest in making you think that this is difficult. The more jargon they use, the more complex they make it seem – the more valuable their expertise appears and the more you are made to feel disempowered and dependent on their expertise.

This is where I hope my book will help. I plan to show you exactly how simple great communications can be. I will walk you through how to develop a comprehensive campaign plan for your vision that makes people care enough to create change.

So at the end of the process, you’ll be equipped to make a difference. You can make people care.

You can ACTUALLY change the world.

So…How Do You Want to Change the World?

This is a community full of changemakers and women with huge visions for how to change the world for the better.

So tell me, what ONE thing would you change about the world if you could wave a magic wand? What causes are you passionate about, and what change are you already creating through your life and work?

Share in the comments below, and let’s support each other to create the change we want to see.

And, if you have a moment, I’d be grateful if you would take part in my survey. Tell me how you want to change the world and how I can help you.

And as a great big thank you for doing so, I’m offering one participant the chance to win a 2-hour PR and communications brainstorm with a leading London PR agency, Pagefield (the one I co-founded!). Just click the link below to take the survey and be in with a chance of winning:

https://www.surveymonkey.co.uk/r/HowToActuallyChangetheWorld

About Sara Price

The Knitting, Baby-whispering Karaoke queen!

Sara is a coach and mentor with over 25 years of experience in campaigning and communications. As well as her ongoing work with Pagefield, the leading independent communications agency that she co-founded in 2010, Sara is a One of Many Certified Coach, a Mastercoach and soon to be author!

Sara began her career in Parliament developing an in-depth understanding of the corridors of power. She then moved on to work as a political advisor to UNICEF where she witnessed the power of individuals and organisations to effect change on a global scale. She sat on the UK Board of one of the world’s largest PR agencies, H&K Strategies, and in 2010 she co-founded Pagefield.

Over the course of her career, she has developed communications programmes for some of the biggest brands in the world from Kelloggs to EDF Energy; advised organisations as diverse as Allied Bakeries and Variety, the Children’s Charity; and co-created multi-national campaigns for Global Peace Ambassador Prem Rawat.

Sara’s newest venture – How to Actually Change the World – is in development right now. If you’d like to help to shape the whole programme and be on the list to hear more, please sign up by emailing sara@renaissance-life.co