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Guest post: Is ignorance bliss? How to stop avoiding your finances

By

Mary Waring
Mary Waring
Recovering superwoman | Dog obsessed | Never too old to change

Mary is a chartered accountant and chartered financial planner – one of only a handful of advisers in the whole of the UK with these qualifications. She’s passionate about changing the way women think about finance, so that they are better equipped to make informed decisions about their future.
Mary Waring
Latest posts by Mary Waring (see all)

Are you someone who’s been avoiding your finances? Then let me tell you a story. I remember the first time I had to give unwelcome news to a client. She was a doctor in her late 50s and had come to take financial advice because she planned to retire at 60 and wanted to check what income she would be able to draw.

At that first meeting she passed over a large bundle of statements showing her holdings, a number of which were very out of date. It was therefore impossible at the meeting to determine the value of what she had saved.

The day before our follow up meeting I had a sleepless night worrying about how she might respond to the news I was about to give her.

Would she burst into tears?

Would she just shrug and say “Oh I’m glad I found out now”?

As a new client I didn’t know her well enough to know how she would respond. And I was quite nervous.

You see, not only could she not retire at 60, but it looked as though retiring at 65 was also unlikely. Really dreadful news for someone who thought her future looked rosy and who was planning how to spend her time when she was no longer working.

Yes, as you can imagine, the news did not go down well.

But at least she was then aware of the situation and being aware was able to address it and do something about it. Admittedly the plan we came up with was completely different to the one she had wanted, but at least she did have a plan. And she agreed this was better than being totally unaware of her situation.

Avoiding your finances? I definitely do not hold the belief “ignorance is bliss”!

Ignorance is a head in the sand approach to not dealing with those issues that cause any form of upset.

But, just like the constant, niggling pain you have which you can ignore for only so long before seeking medical advice, ignorance about your finances cannot continue indefinitely. At some point real life will come and bite you on the bum!

You either find out now, which hopefully gives you time to do something about it if needed.

Or you find out when it’s too late. And then you probably regret not doing something earlier and you kick yourself for ignoring it.

“Hindsight is a wonderful thing! But it’s called hindsight because we have it after the event rather than before.”

I’ve been lucky that since that situation I have rarely had to give such bad news. But I was reminded of that first instance yesterday when I had a meeting with a new client. Let’s call her Jane.

When reality hurts

Jane had recently divorced, had received a financial settlement and was planning her future, and feeling very positive about what was ahead of her. She had moved out of the family home some time earlier and was living in rented property. Following her settlement, she felt now might be the right time to buy a property.

However, she was unsure about where she wanted to be based, and was looking at the options of Scotland, Cornwall or London. And obviously the choice of location would involve a significantly different house purchase value.

We discussed in advance what she wanted her financial plan to look like, and decided on three different property purchase prices and a rental option.

The outcome for Jane: only the rental and lower purchase price allowed her to have the ongoing spending she wanted. For the other 2 options she would have to reduce her ongoing spending so much it wasn’t practical.

Was my client disappointed? Yes, of course she was, since she realised various options she had considered (including buying a property in London) was no longer viable. This was a bitter blow to her.

But as we looked at it further, she realised she still had many options. She could still buy a beautiful house and make it a loving and welcoming home for herself and for her children when they visited. She could still have a wonderful lifestyle enjoying holidays and many luxuries. We concentrated on the options that were available to her, rather than the options that weren’t.

As the meeting progressed, Jane started to see how she could use this knowledge to her advantage rather than dwell on the options which were no longer feasible. In many ways it made her choices easier because the London location was no longer an option to consider.

Avoiding your finances? Consider this

I firmly believe ignorance is not bliss. It’s a means of putting off the inevitable until it’s too late to ignore it anymore.

I believe knowledge is key. It allows you to make plans knowing you have the financial means to support your plan. After all, a plan which you can’t afford is simply a wish.

So, how about you? Have you been avoiding your finances?

Here’s a quick exercise to help you turn things around.

  • Think about all the areas of your money – your current spending/daily budget, investments, pensions, savings. How clear are you on your current situation and how clear on where you’re heading?
  • Is there an area you’re completely in the dark about?
  • How can you get the information you need to check you’re on track – print off statements, request an update, make an appointment with a financial adviser like Mary?

Do it today and get one step closer to taking back control.

Let us know your thoughts!

Do you think ignorance is bliss or do you prefer a plan?

If you want to have a confidential no obligation discussion, please contact me on mary@wealthforwomen.biz.

About Mary

Recovering superwoman | Dog obsessed | Never too old to change

Mary is a chartered accountant and chartered financial planner – one of only a handful of advisers in the whole of the UK with these qualifications. She’s passionate about changing the way women think about finance, so that they are better equipped to make informed decisions about their future.

You can find Mary online at the following links:

Twitter: @marywaring

Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/marywaring

Website: www.wealthforwomen.biz

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Guest Post: The Inner Game of Money

By

Rebecca Robertson
Rebecca Robertson
Rebecca Robertson is the author of Evolve Financial Planning – financial planning education for women; a TedX speaker; and the seven times award-winning Founder and Director of Evolution Financial Planning.

Rebecca is known as the financial planner who is passionate about putting women firmly in control of their finances. She has helped thousands of individuals and families to achieve financial freedom and given them peace of mind that their finances are properly protected in case the worst should happen. With 19 years’ experience, she’s proud to have a 100% satisfaction rating from her happy clients.

As well as providing holistic and independent advice to clients, Rebecca’s also been featured in the Independent’s ‘Women in Finance’ and is a regular media commentator in FT Advisor and New Model Adviser, discussing financial issues particularly in relation to women.
Rebecca Robertson
Latest posts by Rebecca Robertson (see all)

When it comes to your finances, it’s the inner game of money that makes all the difference. Today I’m going to share 4 profiles that can help you figure out what your “inner game” is, but first, let’s think about the context we’re in.

How many women do you know who are super confident about money?

You know…

  • The kind who ask (or even demand!) a pay rise at work – as they know their worth
  • Who won’t accept buying a house for a penny more than the asking price
  • Or who spend money on developing their knowledge to learn more about certain subjects specifically so they can invest more or charge more in their business?

Half your friends? Less than half? Maybe only a few of them?

There aren’t many of them out there!

We all deal with money differently

Money is a far-reaching subject, so just to be clear, I’m talking here about personal finances which affect us day to day. Those areas which mean you hide that bill in the drawer, don’t return a bank phone call, or do an online shop every day.

Perhaps you feel unable to make any decisions, so procrastinate about things or guiltily leave it to your partner to do the financial planning for your family.

It’s so very natural to do these things. Often we aren’t aware we are doing it, and more often than not people don’t challenge you on it as they have their own issues they feel they should be dealing with first…

The fact is, we all tend to doubt ourselves or feel unsure of things we don’t understand. When we understand our own behaviour, we’re able to see where we can make change most effectively, and begin to introduce new habits that will actually stick.

This is why, when I talk to my clients about where they should put their attention first, I always start with this: Money is all about the inner work.

So how can you understand what “inner game” you’re currently playing? The following 4 profiles describe different ways we can approach money.

4 Money Profiles

We all have a little part of these profiles within us, often changing due to personal circumstances and at different times of our lives. These profiles are to give you a general view on your stronger profile at this time.

They’re based on general attributes which we would ‘tend’ to find with individuals but of course, they can be different for some people. Read through and see if any of them resonate more strongly with you – or if you might be able to choose one which best describes your most usual way of handling your finances.

Prominence

  • Tend to like status objects, gadgets, clothes, shoes, cars…
  • Will buy everyone a drink because they care what people think of them.
  • Can be wishful thinkers, hoping for the best.
  • Can get into debt more easily due to these traits.

If this describes you, try to be mindful that:

No matter how many objects or objects you own it cannot bring you deep happiness. Often the joy from buying is short lived. I am not suggesting you stop spending, but try to keep a check on it and consider how else your money could be spent or invested to great a deeper level of happiness or wealth.

Big-Heart

  • Generous at heart – but sometimes that generosity could replace genuine affection.
  • As any children you may have grow older, they will begin to expect more and more, and maybe not understand many money lessons themselves.
  • You tend to put other’s needs first over yours, wanting the best for them.

If this describes you, try to be mindful that: 

Financial indulgence cannot replace love and affection. Your financial needs are equally important. Buying things for others is a lovely thing to do, but is it to make yourself feel better? Get to the root of your need and you may find your finances are a little more comfortable.

Collector

  • Would tend to hoard money, prefer low risk and will want to take the safest option.
  • Tend to save in normal bank accounts and do very well at this but won’t take the next step to invest money, for example in the stock market.
  • Won’t over commit themselves and want to create security around them.

If this describes you, try to be mindful that: 

By creating financial security, you could in fact allow yourself to discover new areas of life you’ve not yet had the chance to discover. Always being in the place of “save save save”, creates other problems – like tax – and then keeping that money secure. Saving is a great thing to do – but have a plan for it.

Bohemian

  • A free-spirited individual who will use money to break free from life and day to day strains.
  • Doesn’t really have a plan or feel worried about how they spend their money as long as it gives them a feeling of joy and independence.

If this describes you, try to be mindful that: 

Life is for living and enjoying as much as you can, but there is a pinch of reality in there which needs to be considered, like your old age. What does the future look like and how can you have the best of both worlds?

What kind of money profile are you?

You may well have a blend of some of these different profiles at play – perhaps different role models around you growing up gave sou slightly different examples. Try not to go into judgement, but simply think about which are the most dominant.

What are your money habits?

When you’ve identified your money profile, you can start thinking about your money habits. How do you save, spend, invest, or give? Are any of these areas ones which you find challanging, or which are a source of tension in your life?

Congratulations: if you know your Money Profile, you’re one step closer to handling the Inner Game of Money.

Join us for Wealth Insights

If you’re curious about wealth and want to create a life with more choice when it comes to your finances, why not join One of many‘s Wealth Insights training? It’s a free, half day life workshop about all things money – to help you finally take control of your finances, so you can make the difference you want to. Click here to sign up!

About Rebecca

Cat and dog owner  | Loves the great outdoors | Tea drinker

Rebecca Robertson is the author of Evolve Financial Planning – financial planning education for women; a TedX speaker; and the seven times award-winning Founder and Director of Evolution Financial Planning.

Rebecca is known as the financial planner who is passionate about putting women firmly in control of their finances. She has helped thousands of individuals and families to achieve financial freedom and given them peace of mind that their finances are properly protected in case the worst should happen. With 19 years’ experience, she’s proud to have a 100% satisfaction rating from her happy clients.

As well as providing holistic and independent advice to clients, Rebecca’s also been featured in the Independent’s ‘Women in Finance’ and is a regular media commentator in FT Advisor and New Model Adviser, discussing financial issues particularly in relation to women.