The mental load isn’t invisible. It’s just ignored.

You know that feeling.

You’ve remembered the birthdays. Filled in the school forms. Ordered the client gifts. Packed the PE kit.

You’ve managed the calendar, the meals, the mood in the room - sometimes with a kind smile, sometimes with gritted teeth.

And still, the feedback comes in:
“You’re so organised.”
“You’re amazing.”
“Honestly, I don’t know how you do it.”

But you do.
You do know how you do it.

You do it by constantly thinking three steps ahead.
You do it by carrying the entire emotional tone of your household, your team, your extended family.
You do it by being the backup system no one even realises they rely on. Until you stop.

And when you do?

The kids are late.
The team can’t find what they need.
The fridge is empty.
The emails pile up.
And somehow… you still feel like you dropped the ball.

It’s not because you’re failing.

It’s because you’ve been holding more than anyone sees.

The work wasn’t invisible.
It was just unacknowledged.

This is what we mean by the mental load. The invisible labour of anticipation, emotional buffering, and task management that so many women absorb by default. And it's not a personal flaw. It’s a cultural script.

But here’s what we so often miss.

This isn’t “just what women do.”
This is emotional labour.

And it’s time we stopped pretending it’s normal.

Because it’s not sustainable.
Not when it’s constant. Not when it’s expected. Not when it goes unshared.

So what can we do?

One small step is to stop carrying all of it by default.

That might mean:

• Delegating not just the task, but the thinking behind it
• Letting someone else manage the family calendar, start to finish
• Saying no to the silent role of emotional sponge

It doesn’t have to be dramatic.
But it does have to start.

Where could you begin?

What’s one thing you could delegate today, including the mental load that goes with it?

You’re not broken. You’re just tired of carrying more than your fair share.

Here at One of many, we’ve supported thousands of women to name the invisible load, and find a new way to move through it.

Overwhelm First Aid Kit is our free guide to help you understand your own overwhelm, and take a first, gentle step toward relief.

Our intention is simple. To support professional women to handle the day-to-day so they can unleash the bigger impact they feel called to make in the world.

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