We don’t need more perfect women leaders. We need braver ones.
I’ve spent the past few months doing something most leaders secretly avoid. Feeling everything.
The uncertainty.
The fatigue.
The not-knowing.
And underneath all of it, the fear that if I really let the mask slip, it might all fall apart.
For years, that mask served me well.
It looked like competence.
Sounded like clarity.
Won me respect in rooms that didn’t know how to hold a woman who feels deeply.
But here’s what I know now: every time I hid behind that mask, I traded a little piece of my aliveness for approval.
And the cost of that exchange is far too high.
The Quiet Erosion of Pretending
Most women leaders don’t burn out from overwork.
They burn out from over-performing.
From managing everyone’s expectations – and their own emotions – at the same time.
From keeping the voice steady in meetings when inside they’re screaming, “This isn’t me anymore.”
That’s not professionalism.
That’s emotional depletion in disguise.
And the longer you wear the mask, the harder it is to remember who you were before you put it on.
What Leadership Really Asks of Us
Real leadership isn’t another layer of performance.
It’s the practice of coming home to yourself – again and again – even when it’s messy.
It’s telling the truth before it’s polished.
It’s saying, “I’m not sure yet,” instead of pretending certainty.
It’s choosing presence over performance.
And that kind of leadership takes more courage than any title ever could.
Leading With Your Humanity (Not in Spite of It)
One of the most powerful lessons I’ve learned over the past few years is that my team don’t need me to be flawless.
They need me to be real.
They’ve seen me tired. They’ve seen me emotional.
They’ve seen me call a pause in a meeting because something didn’t feel aligned.
And instead of losing respect, we’ve built trust.
When I lead without the mask, it gives everyone else permission to exhale too.
When I let the cracks show, it builds something stronger than control ever could trust.
That’s what creates true connection.
Not a perfect façade, but shared humanity.
Because when people feel safe to bring their whole selves to the table, that’s when creativity, compassion, and accountability actually thrive.
If something in this has you exhaling, “oh, that’s me,” then maybe it’s time to lead without the mask.
That’s what we’ll explore inside Elevate.
Three hours of powerful conversation about what it means to lead as you are.
No performance. No pretending.
Just truth, power, and presence.
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